Amnesia . . . I Forgot Why I Chose This Topic

Posted on August 16, 2021 by Charles Yallowitz

Philip J. Fry from Futurama

I forgot what prompted me to choose this topic back in June.  I believe I watched a TV show where a character had amnesia at some point.  It brought up an odd question in my mind in regards to second changes, which I’ll get into Wednesday.  After all, I’m sure we all have an opinion on this classic trope.

Do I have to explain this plot twist?  It’s been used so much that some people forget that it can happen in reality.  Some trauma causes a person to forget either all or some of their past.  There are cases where it can be reversed and other times where there’s nothing that can be done.  We’re talking brain damage here, which could be why some people may prefer amnesia to remain in fiction.  It’s a scary thought to imagine a single blow to the head could erase your memories forever.

That’s what it really is too.  Scary.  Disorienting.  Painful for those who love you and see that you’ve lost so much.  Imagine waking up and seeing your children, but not knowing who they are.  How do you handle that?  Do you believe that they are your children at any point?  Just writing about this makes my skin crawl because it’s a fate that I’ve had nightmares about.  My memory is shaky to begin with at times, but the thought of even a partial wipe makes me anxious.

Fiction typically doesn’t get it right from what I can tell.  Amnesia is played up as comedy or an obstacle for the heroes to handle in order to gain information.  It’s rare that you see a story from the perspective of the amnesiac too.  We tend to see how it effects those around them who may be handling a bigger problem.  The amnesia is simply a tool to make their path more difficult.  Inevitably, this challenge is handled either by finding another source, the memories returning, or the amnesiac left a clue before they were injured.

Quick note:  Amnesia is the loss of memory and NOT the loss of identity.  Also, there are so many types of amnesia that it’s amazing fiction only does the one real flavor.   Three of them are:

  1. Retrograde–  Lose existing, previously made memories first.  Older memories deteriorate slowly.  This happens with dementia.
  2. Anterograde–  You cannot create new memories.  This can be temporary such as having a blackout.
  3. Transient Global–  This is a tough one because it’s not understood very well.  A person with this will become confuse and agitated for several hours.  Memory loss can happen prior to the attack and it’s highly likely that the person won’t remember the episode.

As you can see, there’s nothing in there with an immediate loss of all memory.  I believe that’s possible, but rare and not how we think of it.  This is why authors are able to run wild with the idea too.  I think we become fascinated by a character who forgets their past too.  It brings in tension in regards to them regaining their memories.  Still, it gets used a lot, so experienced audience members won’t give you the same reaction.

Well, what does everyone else think of the amnesia trope?  Think I might do a Questions 3 on Friday too.

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Smorgasbord Coffee Morning – Bring a Guest – John W. Howell and author Gwen M. Plano

Posted on August 16, 2021 by Charles Yallowitz
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#MKTG – Part 3 Facebook Ads Details

Posted on August 16, 2021 by Charles Yallowitz

Hi, SE’ers! Jan here again with another segment on book marketing. I was all ready to move on to another social media platform when I came across …

#MKTG – Part 3 Facebook Ads Details
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The Daughter of Monster Maker Fun Needs Fuel!

Posted on August 15, 2021 by Charles Yallowitz

Frankenstein’s Lab

This is always a fun challenge for me to do every October.  It tends to take a few weeks to set up as well because I don’t have as much free time as I used to.  So, I’m going to get some suggestions now.  This way everything will be nice and ready for the second scariest month of the year.  First is April because it’s when taxes are due and has Passover where pizza isn’t allowed.  Terrifying.

So, what is Monster Maker Fun?  It’s quite simple.

  1. In the comments, you give me 3 made up words.  Total gibberish.
  2. Then I create a post in October (Fridays this year) and turn those words into monsters.
  3. Each beastie will get a paragraph that describes their look, habits, and whatever else springs to mind.
  4. I add a link to your blog (and possibly book if you have one) on that post and give you credit for the names.

These seems fairly straightforward, right?  Here is a link to a list of previous Monster Maker posts. Hoping to have some creative fun again this year.  Thanks to everyone who wishes to join in.

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Goal Post: Accomplishments and Busted Body Parts

Posted on August 14, 2021 by Charles Yallowitz

Last week of my son having camp.  Feels like the summer went by so quickly and he was starting only a few days ago.  School starts for me on the 30th too.  So, I think I have some emotional whiplash here.  Swear it wasn’t too long ago that I finished the school year and put my work clothes away.  Time is such a bizarre human construct.

I should start with last weekend, but my mind is a little blurry.  My son and I just hung around putting Lego sets together and playing video games.  The weather wasn’t too great, so we couldn’t out much.  We did go CD shopping for our trip next weekend.  It’s insane how hard it is to find stores with a good CD selection.  Lots of records out there, so I wonder if I went through a time warp.  Low key was good for us though.  He was still exhausted from his birthday weekend and a busy week of camp, which included several trips.  I was nursing a bad shoulder too.  Don’t worry . . . It’s just tendinitis, so I’ve got some meds and a close relationship with an ice pack.

So, the shoulder limited what I could do, especially since I didn’t get it check out until Thursday.  Still, I managed to finish Slumberlord Chronicles: Darwin & the Fate Bracelet.  I won’t get around to publishing it until some time next year, but that gives me time to find a cover artist.  Praying it doesn’t go into limbo like Do I Need to Use a Dragon? since that one needs 4-5 pictures.  Money being tight really kills me, but I hope a single cover is doable.  I’ll have enough time to financially recover from the summer too, so my hopes are high for Darwin getting his chance to shine.

Speaking of Darwin, I did enjoy writing him.  I need to go through at least once to make sure his habits are consistent.  Some got lost and forgotten such as him walking on his toes when moving and nervous.  I remembered his fabric swatch holding and bouncing in place habits.  There was a point where I started making him more confident and proactive because he needed to be.  That’s the big challenge here.  How do you work with a hero who isn’t on top of everything and is more likely to reach victory in a way that only makes sense to him?  Nearly every encounter Darwin had forced me to ignore my notes because he wasn’t that type of hero.  Extended battles like Luke Callindor and Clyde had aren’t possible with him.  Interrogations by villains backfired on them without a paragraph or two.  Darwin drove everybody with a plan up the wall to the point where nobody, including me, can tell how powerful he really is.  Kind of enjoy that fact.

All that being said, I am nervous for the little guy going forward.  I think Darwin & the Halfling Hunt is where he’s going to be a bigger challenge.  This is where he’s fully on his path instead of finding it.  On the plus side, the future books are set up more for his antics, so my outlines are more fluid and malleable.  This one had many sections where I realized I was going in an unplanned direction with a plot point and I had to find a way to get things back around.  There was one time I had to move sections around to make things work too.  Darwin is really testing my plotting side by having my small pantser side come out and play.  Can’t wait for people to give him a try and hopefully they stay for the long haul.

Sales are non-existent, including the free ones.  Just have to throw that out there.

Not much else going on here.  I’m working on the October posts from the Windemere Monster poll.  Tomorrow will have a volunteer call for this year’s MONSTER MAKER FUN!  With the book done, I’m relaxing and sticking to notebook work.  Hopefully, my shoulder will be better too.  Think I need a lazy week because the following week is the trip and then I’m back at work.  Going to be a wild year again since Covid is still running around.  Maybe I shoulder order some new masks to up my collection.  Unfortunately, really cool ones I saw might not be school friendly.  Fullmetal Alchemist symbols can be mistaken for occult stuff and One Piece has the skull and crossbones.  Even with a straw hat, I’m sure that symbol will be an issue.

I know I talk TV at this point, but I didn’t do much.  I watched ‘Rising of the Shield Hero’ and ‘Cautious Hero’ again because I was focused more on writing.  I could put those on and zone out a bit.  I’ll figure out what anime I’m tackling next week later.  Thinking of ‘Fire Force’ since I never saw season 2.  Exciting!  I expect next Saturday’s goal post to be bland.  To be fair, there is a lot going on that I can’t post about for a variety of reasons, so it isn’t like I’m really sitting on my butt.

Goals of the week?

  1. Relax!
  2. Puzzles!
  3. Get car checked for trip!
  4. Let shoulder heal!
  5. Fire Force!
  6. Pizza!
  7. Notebook work!
  8. Pack for trip!
  9. Sleep in a bit!
  10. Really should clean that bathroom.

(I liked the intro below, but I’m annoyed that this is a restrained video.  The characters aren’t all shown or moving like in the anime.)

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The Narcissist

Posted on August 13, 2021 by Charles Yallowitz

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It is all about me
Not that I would say so
I am subtle
Regardless
Of my booming actions
The eye of the storm
Forever upon me
If it moves too far
I transform
And reclaim my throne
Loyalty is mine
To absorb and hold tight
Never to share
Be afraid of my power
For I will break you
Taking your love
And leaving you pain
Anger
And sadness
Not that I would admit it
After all
I am pure
And a victim
Of those I hurt

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Immortal Wars: Light, Blood, & Tears Part 25

Posted on August 12, 2021 by Charles Yallowitz

(Disclaimer: A warning to those who continue.  This is a sequel to a previous story.  Both of these were written in the mid-1990’s.  While the first one was slightly edited and vanity press published, this one has not been touched in over 20 years.  I figure I should do something with it and people may get a laugh or fright from how I used to be.  Every author comes from somewhere, so this is part of my origin.  To that end, I am deeply sorry for whatever nightmares I will inflict on the literary world and the American English language.  Enjoy?)

PREVIOUS ENTRY CLICK HERE

Fate lands on the top of the Yellowstone Bridge and takes a long look around.  A boat is going under the bridge and seagulls are everywhere.  Traffic is inching by at a normal New York pace, but it is for a different reason.  Draveon is standing in the middle of the bridge and tosses cars around like they were toys.

“Looks like I get to have some fun already.  Big boy is going down,” thinks Fate with a cruel grin.  He makes a long jump off the bridge and hurtles toward the large man below him.  They crash into each other with a massive amount of force and Fate manages to land on his feet.  Draveon skids several yards away before stopping.

“I was wondering when I was going to meet up with you.  Now, I want my sword back, child,” says Draveon as he gets up.  Fate charges in with a savage punch to the man’s jaw.  The force sends a loud boom through the air, but it only knocks Draveon’s head back.

Fate gets slammed through the bridge by a downward punched from Draveon.  The guardian manages to grab onto a beam under the bridge before falling into the distant water.  Draveon is just standing above the hole and laughing.

“Well, I can see that insanity has not made you any tougher.  It has only made you reckless and foolish.  Much like your friend.  I don’t see why I should waste my time with you.”

“Because I was the one that took the sword of light from you.  I was the first one that defeated you.  Now, I’ll defeat you again,” yells Fate.  He swings himself back through the hole and kicks Draveon in the stomach.

“All of those reasons are obsolete in the long run.  I will have my sword back and one lose is not the worst thing in the cosmos.  I’ve been told that it builds character to lose a fight.  But then again, I don’t like that I lost to a skinny child like you.”

Draveon and Fate start trading blows on the bridge and each punch sends tremors through the structure.  All of the people get out of their cars and run to the closest side as the bridge starts to crack.  Neither of the immortals are aware of this while they continue beating on each other.  Fate finally crescent kicks Draveon into the hole and grabs a leg before he falls.

“You aren’t getting away that easily,” laughs Fate.

“I was just about to say the same thing.”  Draveon kicks free and bounces off a support beam toward one of the thick metal towers of the bridge.  With an angry scream, he knocks down the tower and the bridge begins to crumble.  Draveon uses his momentum to bounce back to the street where Fate is waiting for him.   The Mars guardian is staring at him in shock.

“I can’t believe you just did that.  What point is there to destroying this bridge when only the two of us are on it?” asks Fate.

“It’d make things a little more interesting for us.  You scared?”  Draveon grabs a fender off a nearby car and starts swinging it at Fate.  He can’t hit the quicker immortal and manages to cut through a few support cables.  Again the bridge lurches and Fate tumbles to the edge.

“This doesn’t make any sense.  I’m gonna kill that crazy bastard before I lose it again,” whispers Fate as he gets to his feet.  He turns around to see Draveon leaping off the other end of the bridge.  A loud laugh is heard right before an enormous splash sends water into the air.

Fate is trying to figure out what is going on just as he looks below him.  A boat is trying to get underneath the bridge and the falling rocks are coming close to crushing it.  Fate mutters a curse under his breath before diving into the water.  It takes a few seconds for him to clamber onto the boat and start looking for people.

“Where is everybody?  There should at least be a captain on this boat,” says Fate as he catches a steel girder that is coming toward the ship.  He looks to his right to see a handful of people swimming out of harm’s way.

“That’s nice.  I come down here to save them and they save themselves.  I feel like an idiot now.”  Fate looks up in time to see a large chunk of the bridge falling toward him.  The piece crashes into the ship and the entire thing sinks to the bottom along with the Mars guardian.  He stays there and tries to think of what to do next before swimming to the surface.

“Time to go take care of my own house.  Hydrana has to be around this city somewhere.  It might be easier to take care of her than to save an empty boat,” thinks Fate.  He looks up to see that most of the Yellowstone Bridge has collapsed into the water.  All he does is shrug before getting to the closest shore and sprinting in the direction of Central Park.

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Can Narcissism be a Positive?

Posted on August 11, 2021 by Charles Yallowitz

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That’s a really rough list and I agree with it.  Let’s keep in mind that for personal reasons, I’m rather biased here.  I see narcissism as a negative and I’ve found that most people would agree.  Even narcissists who don’t realize they are narcissists.  So, this is going to be a tough one.  Is there such a thing as Healthy Narcissism?

According to some psychologists, there is.  Has it’s own Wikipedia page too.

From reading up on it, Healthy Narcissism stems from being confident and knowing your self-worth without taking it to the extreme.  Honestly, it seems to be describing the levels of confidence before one reaches arrogance.  I saw mention of narcissism being a spectrum, so not everyone is the same.  Other people used explanations such as emotional defense mechanisms, stage of emotional maturity, and other things that boiled down to it being a part of everyone.

This isn’t going well because I’m not sure I can get behind it.  I’m going to use the chart on the Wikipedia page to compare Healthy Narcissism and Destructive Narcissism.  This is specific for managers, but it gives a decent overview:

  1. Healthy means they have self-confidence that fits with reality.  Destructive means they’re grandiose and slightly delusional on their own abilities.
  2. Healthy narcissists enjoy power without hunting for it.  Destructive will stop at nothing to gather power and have no inhibitions in this area.
  3. Healthy show empathy for others and do not exploit those around them.  Destructive looks at others as tools to exploit and focuses on socially acceptable responses with no emotion behind them.  I want to add here that this is a hallmark of narcissists.  They’re know to have no empathy for others, which is why this part makes me doubt the legitimacy of Healthy Narcissists.  Once they show empathy and concern for others then they’re not really a narcissist, are they?
  4. Healthy have consistent values that they don’t stray from.  Destructive get bored easily and will repeatedly change their values and path to gain attention.  Here we have another hallmark, I believe.
  5. Healthy narcissists have a positive childhood that supports their self-esteem and gives them limits.  Destructive have had a traumatic childhood that either disables their sense of self-worth or eliminates their sense of limits/consequences.

I was really hoping I could research and write this in a way that would show you can have narcissism as a positive trait.  Yet, I didn’t convince myself.  You can have a healthy dose of egotism and confidence.  Maybe even an abundance of arrogance, but narcissism requires a lack of empathy in my mind.  So, I guess I don’t think it’s possible.

If anyone can give a counterpoint then feel free.  I’m curious to see what other people have to say about this.

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Teaser Tuesday: Here to Res . . . Uh Oh!

Posted on August 10, 2021 by Charles Yallowitz

Cover Art by Jason Pedersen

Today, we have Timoran Wrath getting a well-deserved spotlight.  I admit that I had to edit a little of the teaser to remove a piece of information.  Want to know what changed?  Then check out Legends of Windemere: Charms of the Feykin for 99 cents!

Continue reading →

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Narcissists and How They Operate

Posted on August 9, 2021 by Charles Yallowitz

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This is a tough one because people don’t always know what these types of characters or real people are like.  We see them as egotistical manipulators or arrogant figures that are prone to gloating.  Sadly, I’ve had to interact with enough narcissists to learn about how they really operate.  It’s driven me to look stuff up, which could help design characters with this flaw.  Of course, it’s tough to do because a narcissist can be truly destructive to those around them.  Let’s look at some misconceptions:

  1. Narcissists have High Self Esteem–  This is believed because they come off as confident and sure of themselves.  They are never wrong even in the face of being proven wrong, which makes conversations a challenge.  In reality, they have low self esteem and are constantly working to gain attention to counter this.  Nearly everything they do is about hiding their weakness and coming off a strong.
  2. Narcissists Love to Win Fights–  People think that narcissists love to win arguments, which is partially true.  Yet, there is a narcissism tactic where they will purposely provoke someone they know.  Many times it’s a friend or family member.  This is done by waiting for the ‘target’ to be weak and off-guard then pushing their buttons when nobody else or only the narcissist’s supporting system is around.  The goal is to get yelled at to the point where you’re seen as the victim.  This creates attention and sympathy even though it hurts somebody who may be close to the narcissist.  It continues until the relationship hits a point where it needs to end.  Either that ‘target’ stops things for their own good or the narcissist realizes that it’s at the point where people will get suspicious if they stay in contact.
  3. Narcissists are Loners–  They act like they don’t need anybody and they’re perfectly fine being on their own.  Not even close.  Narcissists need an audience.  They need people who find their current sense of identity acceptable.  The reason is because they can only gain a sense of belonging and self-worth from others.  Internally, they cannot muster these two things on their own.
  4. Narcissists have no Loyalty–  This one . . . is actually true.  Oh, they understand the concept because this is what they want from others.  They demand acceptance and praise from their group of friends.  It isn’t reciprocated.  Once a narcissist feels that a person has become disloyal or they are asked to help in a way that is beyond their ability, they cut the person loose.  In this way, you can see how a narcissist is repeatedly reinventing themselves and gathering new circles of friends with every incarnation.  The older ones simply didn’t make the cut because they were no longer loyal to the new identity.
  5. Narcissists are Always Big Personalities–  We imagine the type as being loud and the center of attention.  They are surrounded by people and know how to schmooze a crowed.  Not true.  Some narcissists are low key.  They gain what they need through manipulation and playing the victim card.  These can be harder to identify because they don’t fit the mold we imagine.

Those are the big ones I can think of.  Can you think of anything else in regards to narcissists that people get wrong?

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