Don’t Talk Like That: How to Write Good Dialogue–Punctuation

Hi SErs! Harmony here 🙂 Today, I’d like to take another look at dialogue. Because this is such a large topic, I have spread the topic over a few …

Don’t Talk Like That: How to Write Good Dialogue–Punctuation
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Teaser Tuesday: Boredom of a Monster #fantasy #vampires

Cover Art by Alison Hunt

Time for another teaser for War of Nytefall: Savagery.  This is a fairly simple one with a fun question at the end.  Enjoy.

Continue reading

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The Bully Hero: Saving Your Life and Calling You Names

Bakugo from My Hero Academia

It would be nice if all heroes acted politely, loving, and . . . well . . . ideally heroic even in fiction.  Honestly, I think this is what people expect more so today than when I was growing up.  Even anti-heroes don’t have as many edges as they used to, so a character like Bakugo up there can really ruffle some feathers.  I mean:

As you can tell, the issue that appears is the overall meanness and anger that a Bully Hero displays.  They spit insults, are terrible in team settings, and can be selfish.  These are attributes that many people place with villains.  At the very least, it’s with a hero who will either go evil or isn’t the main character.  They could be a rival who is created in contrast to the more noble protagonist.  Sadly, this ends up being where we pigeonhole heroes with this kind of attitude.  It makes Bakugo a rarity and explains why there are many who don’t like him.  After all, he isn’t nice.

Of course, this doesn’t mean you can’t or shouldn’t make a focal hero with a bully mentality.  There is room for growth and softening without losing all of their edges, but it is difficult to keep the audience around for the opening stages.  The insults, threats, and callous behavior can be off-putting, which is why some authors will typically steer clear of this persona.  There’s that danger of going too far and losing the more noble aspects of their personality.  It’s easy to do since we can get so focused on the negative to make sure those come across.  After all, we don’t want the character to abruptly turn into a nice person.  The delicate balance needs to be maintained throughout the entire adventure or until the character sheds the bully personality.  Not always possible if they still gain success and victories while being a jerk.

I think the most important part of a Bully Hero is to make it clear that this character wants to do good.  They openly demonstrate that they are here to save the day regardless of their attitude.  Continuing to use Bakugo as an example, he wants to be the greatest hero in the world and sees everyone else as stepping stones.  He threatens and bullies others, especially Midoriya, but moves into the mindset of a combat-based hero when that is what’s needed.  You never get a true sense that Bakugo will turn evil, but the possibility is there to keep his edge for the opening section.  Then, he grows and starts to accept help in some fashion as well as refusing an opportunity to be a villain.  All of this combined turns him into an abrasive character, but one that you can’t deny is a hero.

My son always thought of Bakugo as a minor villain because of the attitude, which makes sense for a child.  We teach children that bullying is bad and this creates the sense that those who do so are villains.  So, a hero like that won’t be perceived as one until they outright prove themselves.  It was around season 3 of the anime that my son began to see Bakugo as a hero, but that was because he loudly declared that he would be one.  It was a scene that started his change and led to scenes where he was visibly softer regardless of the insults and threats.  At this point, the other characters and the audience get a sense of that simply being the type of person he is.  You need a Bully Hero to show their vulnerability and softer side even if it’s only peeking through.  That’s how you make sure that they are never perceived as a villain.

I’m sure everybody can think of another Bully Hero, but I wonder if they’re from an older period of time.  At least with American shows and movies, I can’t think of many that appeared in recent years.  Those that are violent aren’t verbal jerks and only threaten the bad guys, so they remain team players.  Maybe they’re simply not popular or more difficult to write than I realize.  What do other people think?

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Writing Styles: Extroversion and Introversion

Hello SE friends, Gwen with you today, and together we’ll be exploring how extroversion or introversion affects our writing. Let’s begin with a story…

Writing Styles: Extroversion and Introversion
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Smorgasbord Bookstore and Cafe – New Book on the Shelves – #Fantasy Savagery (War of Nytefall Book 6) by Charles E. Yallowitz

Delighted to share the news of the latest book by Charles E. Yallowitz…Savagery (War of Nytefall Book 6) About the book For the first time in over a …

Smorgasbord Bookstore and Cafe – New Book on the Shelves – #Fantasy Savagery (War of Nytefall Book 6) by Charles E. Yallowitz
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A Month of Poetry in June?

I toss random stuff here on Sundays, so here we go.

I’m trying to set up a month of poems for June since it’s going to be a rough one.  School year is ending and I’ll either have a cover artist for Do I Need to Use a Dragon? or still be hunting.  Personal life stuff may be in the way as well.  Not to mention I’m out of writing-based topics to share.  So, I was thinking of indulging in my poetic side for a month.

Only thing I’m trying to decide is how to do it.  I still think I’ll use Mondays to make a poem for each of my published series.  Then, I’m stumped.  Do I come up with random topics, continue promoting books in some fashion, or try to think of a weekly theme?  I know I’m going to stick with free form style because I’m too drained and busy to attempt a more structured poem.  So, I’m just hitting a wall.

Does anybody else do poetry on their blog?  I’m curious as to how you come up with topics or if I’m trying to hard.  Be happy to hear any feedback on this idea.

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Goal Post: A New Set of Outlines . . . Also Life

I’m writing this Friday night after going out to a late birthday dinner with a friend.  We delayed it to allow me to have more time with my son.  Anyway, that means I’m really tired, but still writing this to make sure I can sleep in.  That or get on my bike without worrying about making the goal post.  Either way, I’m sleepy and going to be rambling at times.

Work and life were chaotic.  Schedules got rearranged.  This was actually the last week of the quarter for me, so it was really busy.  My son is having trouble in school as things get more complicated.  If I wasn’t juggling work, helping him with homework, or interacting with the ex-wife, I was trying to figure things out.  We may have found the problem and he passed his latest test.  Hopefully, it can carry over into other subjects and we see him pull out of this downward slope.  It’s been rough because he does great with studying and homework, but tests are an issue.  Frustrating that kids can be really smart and know things, but they’re simply bad a taking tests.

It’s been a week since War of Nytefall: Savagery came out.  Thank you to everyone who helped promote the book and bought a copy.  At this point, I’ve sold 5 copies at 99 cents each.  So, it’s not moving, but I shouldn’t be surprised.  Don’t have thousands of dollars to drop into promoting or hours of free time to do things.  I’m struggling to maintain this blog and a slight Twitter presence.  I’ll be happy if I can sell 15 copies by the end of the month.  I will say the 99 cent price drop gave me a little movement, but not enough to do more than buy a weekly pack of Twizzlers.  That’s author life these days, I guess.

The big plan for the weekend is to start outlining Tales of the Slumberlord.  I think I have 8 books here.  There’s a trilogy I have after this with the same hero, so I’m dancing between leaving it alone or making it a book in the series.  Thankfully, all of these tales are self-contained since Darwin’s shtick is to wander from one adventure to another.  He’s the connector with the main plot going over his head while he involves himself in the destinies of others.  It’s only the first and final book where his own tale is in the spotlight.  I don’t know if this makes it any easier.  Guess I need to tackle the first book and move on from there.  I have to read over the general synopsis too because I can’t remember if it takes place in one city or several.

The outlining has me nervous because I haven’t made one of these since . . . Well, I was still married when I made one from scratch.  I’ve done some short stories, but those are quick scenes.  These are the 3-4 section chapters.  Might take me all weekend to get one finished, which is fine.  I don’t know if Darwin stories will be as lengthy as previous tales, but I’m going to have to think things through.  He can be random in the direction he goes in, but also things are ‘black/white’ to him, so he can end up walking right to the finish line.  Think of someone who is so ‘black/white’ that mind games depending on nuance don’t even register.  Darwin is starting to become more of a challenge than I though in terms of personality.

Wish I had more to report, but I don’t.  TV was me getting through the original ‘Tenchi Muyo’ episodes.  The series isn’t as good as I remembered.  Can’t put my finger on why I kept losing interested either.  Thinking of tossing ‘Ranma 1/2’ on to get through more of that while I outline this week.  The big series I want to watch are looking more like summer things when I have more viewing time.  I need something that are practically mindless, so ‘Ranma 1/2’ may work best.  Been a while, but I remember it being fairly repetitive and predictable.

I think I’m posting about the Poetry Month tomorrow.  Not 100% certain since I’ve been moving stuff around.  I don’t like the new look of WordPress when it comes to looking at my posts.  I can’t choose a category and look at only that grouping, which is what I used to help keep track of Teaser Tuesdays and Immortal Wars.  The whole thing looks fairly ugly too.  I’ve had to use the block system to make a few posts too.  A few volunteers looked to  have trouble with it as well, so War of Nytefall: Savagery took a hit from the clunky interface.  Not like anything will change.  The new system is here to stay whether we hate it or loathe it.

Goals of the week:

  1. Get sleep.
  2. Biking.
  3. Outline Tales of the Slumberlord
  4. Watch a little TV
  5. Puzzles
  6. Get some fresh air
  7. Wheeze due to fresh air having pollen
  8. Get more sleep
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Ask-A-Character: Clyde

Cover Art by Alison Hunt

I haven’t done one of these in a long time.  Mostly because they are very hit or miss with more on the latter.  Yet, I do wonder if people would ask Clyde any questions.  He is the protagonist of War of Nytefall.  On the other hand, not many have read the series or pay full attention to the posts about him.  I still get messages talking as if he’s the villain going up against a band of vampire hunters that I mysteriously haven’t mentioned on this blog at all.  Weird.  So, who or what is Clyde?

Clyde is:

  • A former thief who became a vampiric thief prior to the Great Cataclysm.
  • He created a gang of thieves within the vampire world, which included Mab Winthrop (his partner), Chastity Sullivan, Titus Winthrop, Bob, and Luther Grathan.  Those last 3 were the leaders of the mercenary side of the gang.  Chastity would do the blackmailing and information gathering.  Clyde and Mab were the ones who would do heists.
  • Clyde had allied himself with Xavier Tempest in the old days because they got along.  This is also why General Kenneth Decker was considered a good friend and a partial member of the gang.
  • Clyde and Mab broke up because of a misunderstanding caused by Chastity.
  • Clyde tried to steal a Duragian (God of the Sun) artifact and was caught.  His execution was interrupted by the Great Cataclysm, which buried him for 50 years along with the entire temple city.
  • Upon his return, Clyde gradually learned that he was what would eventually become a Dawn Fang.  He was the first one of this new vampire breed.  He had a heartbeat, could eat human food, didn’t need to kill for blood, and didn’t grow weak in the sunlight.
  • He has a severe battle lust that may be a side-effect of his Lord’s Rage power.  These two things are unique to him, so he fights every day to keep them in check.  His other powers are monstrous physical abilities, illusions, and heightened senses.
  • His relationship with Mab has been rekindled, but they’re dealing with a rough patch in the books right now.
  • Clyde and Lost are having to work closer together in War of Nytefall: Savagery
  • He has a weapon that has been enchanted to fit into his pocket even thought it’s a large sword.  The weapon is connected to a gauntlet that he puts on his hand and it drains his blood through crystal needles to vibrate the blade.  This gives a it a makeshift chainsaw effect, but also risks setting off his Lord’s Rage.
  • Clyde has a pet Eusu.
  • He named his kingdom Nytefall in order to mock Xavier who rules the ancient kingdom of Nyte.

That’s all there is about him, so maybe some questions can come about.  We’ll see how this goes.

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Immortal Wars: Light, Blood, & Tears Part 14

(Disclaimer: A warning to those who continue.  This is a sequel to a previous story.  Both of these were written in the mid-1990’s.  While the first one was slightly edited and vanity press published, this one has not been touched in over 20 years.  I figure I should do something with it and people may get a laugh or fright from how I used to be.  Every author comes from somewhere, so this is part of my origin.  To that end, I am deeply sorry for whatever nightmares I will inflict on the literary world and the American English language.  Enjoy?)

PREVIOUS ENTRY CLICK HERE

“This has to be a joke.  Right?  A sick joke that she’s playing,” mutters Infinity when Fate tells the others about Hydrana.  Infinity is sitting with his shirt on the table and bandages wrapped around his torso.  The three remaining guardians are sitting at the indestructible Mars oak table in the Main Hall.

“I’m not laughing.  I did what was right,” replies Fate, who is slumped over in the jeweled throne.

“What could have possessed you to let her go?  She’s an insane immortal with deadly potential!  Not to mention she is in possession of a magical artifact!” exclaims Miracle as she removes a dripping bandage from her swollen forehead.

“I think he was too scared of her.  Didn’t want to get bruised, Eddie?” asks Infinity.

“No.  It wouldn’t have helped anyone if I had stopped her.  The damage has already been done,” answers Fate.

“Damage that you caused!” yells the Earth guardian.

“We will talk about that issue in private, Steven.  Right now, I want Miracle to set up one of the space skimmers with the experimental, personal hovercraft.  The plan is that two of us will take out Adriana’s group while the third guardian will go after Hydrana in the hovercraft.  Go prepare the ship and bring some of the sun-forged weapons just in case we run into Adriana’s gang.  We’ll be in the space skimmer bay in an hour at most.  Hopefully.”

Once Miracle leaves, Infinity gets to his feet and says, “This is all your fault, Slane.  If you hadn’t yelled at her about her parents, Hydrana would still be sane and have stayed with us.  You’re the one who caused this problem in the first place.”

“So I’ve been hearing for the last five hours.  I know that you love her, but even you couldn’t prevent this from happening.”  Fate remains perfectly calm and sits straight in the throne like a king.  He makes no motion to move or attack.

“You knew this was going to happen!  Why didn’t you try to stop it instead of making it worse!  I knew you were getting cold, but pushing Delila over the edge was uncalled for!  How could you make her go insane!  She never did anything to you that would give you any right to do that!”  Infinity telekinetically throws a few chairs through the windows and punches a hole in the floor.  He finally calms down and sits on the edge of the table.

“Are you finished?  Because you totally misunderstood what I meant.  I didn’t know that any of this would happen.  And this problem would have occurred no matter what I had said or did.”

“How?”

“Her parents, especially her father, caused this problem before any of us even knew her.  All of Delila’s pain was either hiding or being consciously stored deep inside her head.  Every now and then a little of the mental anguish would make itself known in the form of either psychotic or child-like behavior.  Right now, it is like an enormous dam inside her brain has exploded and every memory of pain and loneliness is chaotically swimming around inside her skull.  If this had happened a hundred years from now, then we would have a bigger problem because she wouldn’t be able to face the source of her demons.  She must face her parents in order to get closure,” explains Fate as he gets to his feet and sits next to Infinity.

“You’ve been reading those damn psychology books again.  But I see your point.  Somehow.  In order to stop this and prevent it from reoccurring, Hydrana has to talk to her parents.  Wouldn’t it be better if she had some friends with her?” asks Infinity while he scratches a small tattoo of a thunderbird that is on his bared chest.  He picks up his shirt and pulls it over his bandaged torso.

“Yes and no.  It would be helpful if she gets angry and decides to cut loose with her powers.  That’s why I want to get a space skimmer ready and get you under control at the same time.  But this is something that she has to do alone,” mentions the Mars guardian.

“Me?  Why do you have to get me under control?  I’m fine.”

“I know how you feel about her.  If I saw Miracle go insane and I didn’t know how to save her, it would bring me down with her.  I want to make sure you don’t go down with Delila because I’m going to need your help.  Especially if we run into Adriana’s group and Hydrana at the same time.”

“Of course you need my help.  But there is one thing you have to know right now.”  Infinity’s eyes take a dark, foreboding look as he stares down at Fate.  The Mars guardian just stares back and smiles at the silent challenge.

“What’s that?  You’re the one that’s going after Hydrana?  Not in my lifetime.  Once we land on Earth, we decide on what to do.  Most likely I will go take care of her since so many people think I’m to blame.  But we’ll decide that later.”

“Fine.  This is what I really wanted to say.  If I am there when we find Hydrana and push comes to shove, I’ll be on her side.  Nothing personal, but that is where my loyalty will lie.”

“Then you simply won’t be there.  The way she’s acting, push will come to shove and then turn into a battle to the death.  I don’t need another guardian going rogue on me during this mission.  So, you won’t be the one that hunts down your girlfriend.  You’ll be way too emotionally involved.  Come on.  Miracle is probably done by now.”  Fate walks off toward the space skimmer bay and Infinity has to run to keep up.

“I’m too emotionally involved?  What about you and Miracle?  Kelly considers Hydrana an adopted sister and so do you.  Then again you are acting like a cold, heartless bastard right now.  So, why would you care about Delila?” Infinity growls.

“I don’t want to be like this.  This week was supposed to help me with my problems, but Adriana and your girlfriend just gave me a lot more problems.  And thanks to the quick battle I had with our little runaway, I am getting worse.  The mental abilities of an immortal are more powerful than that of a normal being.  There are some powers that all immortals possess, which have been undocumented.  Hydrana has displayed one that was unknown to SEAS until now.  It seems her mind has too many negative thoughts and she can give off her excess pain by intimately touching someone.  Like a kiss, which she gave me in order to mess my head up.  So, now we have to hurry before I join Delila on the slaughter circuit.”

“Well, if anyone can handle mental demons, it would have to be you.  You’ve been doing it since we’ve met.  Is what she did to you permanent?”

“Nah.  SEAS told me that her little trick will eventually disappear, but by then my own demons will be running around inside my brain.  Thankfully I can hold it off for a day or two.”

Without another word, the three guardians leave the sun base in an older type of space skimmer.  Each one thinks of the five crazy immortals on Earth, but only Fate worries about the one that could be in their very midst.

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How Do Dawn Fangs Have Babies?

Yahoo Image Search

First, never look up ‘vampire babies’ on an image search.  The results are terrifying and still haunt my dreams.  I assume since I’m writing this at the end of February.  Still, they were freaky and not helping me with the topic.

So, it’s been established that Dawn Fangs (Windemere vampires) are able to give birth to ‘live’ young.  In War of Nytefall: Savagery this comes into play.  You’ll find out how when you read the book.  The point of this post is to explain how these vampires can give birth.  This was explained in the series, but I still get a sense that people don’t fully understand.  Mostly because I can’t just plop the info down like a science lesson.  Also, I’ve noticed that many of those who ask haven’t read the books.  Figure it makes for an interesting topic, so here we go.

*Warning: Sex will be mentioned in passing.*

Dawn Fangs can have sex like everyone else and it involves the same type of fluids.  Since all the gametes are in play, pregnancy is possible.  Gestation is typically the same as with a mortal being 9-10 months, but certain powers and diets alter the timeline.  Not to mention that there are spells to hurry pregnancy along if there are complications or unique situations.  That’s not really important here.  After the proper amount of time, the female Dawn Fang will give birth to a baby . . . Sort of.

This is why things didn’t run smoothly when they began giving birth.  Dawn Fang babies are born without a pulse, so they can be mistaken for dead.  Now, there can be miscarriages and stillbirths with these beings.  Don’t think that isn’t possible and a Dawn Fang baby can die if it isn’t given the mother’s blood within an hour of being born.  This awakens the baby’s system and it begins doing the normal routine of crying, eating, sleeping, pooping, and occasionally crushing things with superhuman strength.  All Dawn Fang babies are more with ridiculous strength in the same way that human babies have that surprising grip.  It does fade over time unless it’s one of their special abilities, but they can be dangerous for non-Dawn Fangs to raise.

So, when do they get their special powers?  Not until they reach early teens such as 11, 12, or 13 years old.  Prior to that, all Dawn Fang babies have the ability to control mortals as body guards, which are called Utukku.  This only happens when they don’t have a parent and the victim can be released at any time.  If the mind control hasn’t been going on for more than week then the person doesn’t remember what happened.  Beyond that creates long-term memories, which can lead to issues.  Utukku gain enhanced physical abilities, so those that remember tend to push for full vampirism to maintain or go beyond those superhuman levels.  This is a big reason why Clyde is very careful about Dawn Fang pregnancies because they are a risk to his people staying a secret.  Not to mention they can become unruly once their powers appear, which creates a strong desire to test them out and experiment.

Diet-wise, Dawn Fang babies start on the blood of their mother and, occasionally, their father.  Like a mortal baby, they move onto solid food as they mature in the same progression and temperament.  Education is the same, so there really isn’t much of a difference beyond powers, fangs, and having blood.  In fact, one could say that Dawn Fang children growing up among mortals increases the chance of them seeing people as more than food.  Another step in the right direction for vampire/mortal relations.

Finally, a Dawn Fang baby can come from the union of a Dawn Fang and a mortal.  This doesn’t always mean that they will be a vampire.  The genetics get a little strange and fantastical at this point.  I would say there is a 75% chance that the child is going to be a Dawn Fang, which means 25% of them being a mortal.  This hasn’t come up yet because the Dawn Fangs haven’t done much in the way of breeding with mortals.  Any who have are staying quiet or left the baby with the mortal parent.  Now, you also have racial, which adds to the confusion.  If both parents are Dawn Fangs then it’s a half-breed such as half-elves and half-orcs.  A mortal parent changes that to it being one or the other.  This time, the 75% is on the mortal’s side and the 25% is the Dawn Fang.  For example:

A human mortal and an elven Dawn Fang have a child.  They have a 75% chance of being a Dawn Fang and a 75% chance of being human.  So, it’s more likely that they will be a human Dawn Fang.

To be fair, I’m not going to be playing the odds in books where this comes up.  All Womb Born will simply be there and they are the way they are.  No sense in bringing math any further into this.  On that note, hope this clears some things up.  If not then feel free to ask in the comments.

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