Yeah. I didn’t have much of a plan after a busy week. Wanted to do a test of the War of Nytefall: Savagery blurb, but I didn’t get around to writing it. There was a poem idea and some stories that I wanted to do as well, but I really didn’t have the time. So . . . I’m posting a bunch of funnies in the hopes of making people smile. All of these came from a Yahoo Image Search.
To be honest, I don’t wanna do this. I would normally talk about how my week went and then a bit about what’s coming up. But . . . This week sucked . . . hard . . . like a vacuum with something to prove. Right down to the very end too. If there was any good then it got overshadowed, so I don’t know what to do here.
I can’t even get into it because it’s either work or personal stuff that shouldn’t be aired in public. Things just kept going wrong. Were there pluses? Well, my son aced a science test. More importantly, he majorly aced a math test that he had to take on his own in school and did it without needing his extra time. He came close to failing this subject in the first quarter, but he’s done amazing now. So, it goes to show how far he can go when he gets comfortable and we figure out his nuances. His reward, thought it wasn’t intended to be that, is a father/son trip to the zoo tomorrow. I’ll try to get some good pics for a Sunday post because I’m running out of ideas for those.
Let’s see . . . I didn’t get any writing done. I do get the first covid vaccine shot today. I think the order differs from state or county though. Teachers got on the list here and I managed to snag a spot. I’ll be resting after that if the little guy lets me. Monday is the promise of video games since it’s a 3-day weekend. Maybe watch a movie or cartoons depending on what else we do. I should convince him to do some drawing too since it’s been a while. It’s very cold, so our activities are limited.
Next week might see some writing getting done around Thursday. Prior to that I have meetings and my son who I want to have time with. I have 25 sections left of Do I Need to Use a Dragon? and that might take me to the end of February. I thought I’d get one or two done this weekend while my son slept, but I’m not feeling it. I can feasibly get 15 done during the next period that he’s with his mom even with a party one that I’m going to one night. That leaves me 10 and then the hard part. What to do after that? I guess finally get back to outlining fiction while I figure out if I should send the tip book out for some people to look at. I’m still nervous about that because it’s about opinions, so I don’t know how beta readers take to that.
Only other stuff I did was watch some shows. I finished up ‘Slayers’ Seasons 4 and 5, so that entire anime series is under my belt. Can’t find the movies though. I started a smaller one called ‘Angel Links’ since ‘Disenchanted’ got new episodes yesterday. ‘Angel Links’ is 13 episodes and it’s connected to one of my favorite series called ‘Outlaw Star’. I put the intro up top. I don’t know if it’s a popular or obscure anime, but it was on when I was in college. I actually did a Halloween costume as the main character, who has bright red hair. The spray didn’t come out for a while and washing it the first night made it look like somebody exploded in the shower stall. Wish they did more. Anyway, that’s what I’m doing TV-wise.
Well, I’m not able to drag myself along any more. Next weekend should have more since I get father/son time and a few more stories. I hope. Honestly, I thought this week was going to be better than the last. I said it out loud and everything short of severe injury happened. I say severe because I ended up stabbing my thumb with a broken staple that a kid left in a stapler. Is anybody really surprised at my luck lately?
Goals of the week:
Dr. Evil
I was going to do a big post about this topic, but I realized that this could be one that differs from person to person. So, it’s best for me to start with myself and then open up the floor. To opinions and not letting people fall into a vat of acid that also has robotic piranhas.
You see, it’s really hard to write a villain if you’re going for one who should be hated. I think it’s gotten more difficult over the years because people are more into sympathetic villains. We want to know why they do what they do and can reach the point where we kind of feel for them in a way. You get a group of the fandom that roots for the bad guys too. That seems to be the easiest thing these days because you pull back on how evil they are and give room for forgiveness. Once you cross that line, you can’t have them be sympathetic at all . . . Unless it’s Anakin Skywalker killing a bunch of children, which doesn’t seem to have reduced Darth Vader’s popularity at all.
Now, this topic isn’t about that, but I bring it up for a good reason. Every time I make a post about villains, people comment primarily with those that they feel sorry for or have some sympathetic side. It’s never a true villain that people bring up now even if the topic leans more towards that side of the coin. Why is that? Is it because people don’t want to think about the truly monstrous characters? I think it’s that way for some because there’s no connection there. That’s because they do the horrible things that we would never dream of doing. People who do tend to be the types that other humans would really want to avoid. In fact, we tend to call such people ‘monsters’ when they give in to that darkness and are caught. The villains of our world rarely have the sympathetic side that those in fiction have.
I’ve wondered for a while if there’s a way to go too far with the evil. Every time I try to talk about the subject, I run into that ‘beloved baddie’ issue. So, I never get very far. That might be because everyone has a different limit as to what they will accept from a character before they turn away. The gradients are small, but they’re definitely at a point where you get debates over if a character is redeemable or not. For myself, rape is a big ‘you are dead to me’ thing with villains while another person might put the line at ‘shoplifting’. Seriously, I talked with a person years ago who had this pet peeve about shoplifting in fiction. On the other side of me, I know people who will still root for the rapist villain because they’re ‘cool’ or ‘entertainingly evil’. So, there are those with incredibly high tolerances for evil acts in fiction to the point where they won’t turn on a horrific monster. That isn’t to say they would do it themselves, but they enjoy seeing the darkest depths of depravity.
Now for the questions:
Hello SE readers, Gwen with you today, and it’s my pleasure to offer Part II of the four-part series on co-authorship. Last week, John Howell …
Co-Authorship Part II: Shared Vision
(Disclaimer: A warning to those who continue. This is a sequel to a previous story. Both of these were written in the mid-1990’s. While the first one was slightly edited and vanity press published, this one has not been touched in over 20 years. I figure I should do something with it and people may get a laugh or fright from how I used to be. Every author comes from somewhere, so this is part of my origin. To that end, I am deeply sorry for whatever nightmares I will inflict on the literary world and the American English language. Enjoy?)
On the farthest, darkest side of Pluto, is a structure of festering evil. It is an enormous, ebony tower that resembles the legendary Tower of Babel. Though there are no visible windows, the hallways are filled with a sickening, red light. Occasionally, a swift shuffling is heard or a pair of sinister eyes can be noticed within the eerie gloom of the hallways. This is the evil immortals’ highly protected home, the Black Tower.
“This should do the trick. Now, where did I put that pink bottle? There it is. Can you hand me that small, pink bottle of cyanide on the shelf?” asks a gorgeous blond while she works with very a complex chemistry setup. This woman calmly stares at the bubbling test tubes with her fiery, green eyes and she keeps her skin-tight clothing covered by a pale lab coat.
“Cyanide? Do you think that toxin seem a little too potent and deadly for our intentions? We do not want to kill any of them, Adriana. That will certainly not help any part of your plan,” answers Startrix with her dead-leaf voice. This woman has terrifying, orange eyes, but the rest of her body is covered by ugly, metal armor.
“Speak for yourself, Startrix. After the beating all of us took over a year ago, half of those idiots are lucky to be breathing. It took months for me to finally calm down from the embarrassment of being defeated by a group of novices. But with your vision powers and my superior skill in the field of chemistry . . .”
“Skill in chemistry? That is a very big understatement when it is pertaining to you, seducer.”
“Please don’t get a sense of humor until the end of the immortal wars. I only need to add a few more things to the drink. Pass me that golden box that you’re sitting on. And please try to be gentle with it. The contents are extremely old and fragile. A I think one of them is explosive.”
“Here.” The armored immortal tosses the medium-sized box and watches Adriana catch it without even looking at it. To the mysterious immortal’s surprise, the voluptuous chemist takes out three large bottles of strong liquor.
“Orion rum? Ursa whiskey? Draco scotch? Those are some of the strongest alcoholic beverages in this universe. Orion rum is even illegal on a few of the planets because it can kill plant life. Unless you plan to make everyone drunk, they do not have any practical use in your potion!” exclaims Startrix as her friend pours the three liquids into a large witch’s cauldron. When she adds the test tubes that she was working on, a small puff of rainbow smoke spurts out of the potion and hits Adriana right in the face. Before turning to her ally, the blond genius tries to clear her head of the hallucinations that appear in front of her eyes.
“I knew I should have forgotten that damn whiskey. I hate the side effects of that stuff. Unless there really are blue and purple bunnies playing soccer in the air.”
“Not this time. Here take this drink. It should help clear your head. After quickly sending you through all the stages of a drunken haze. Please do not breath on me until the potion takes effect. Now, what are those alcoholic drinks for?”
“Hiccup. Oh, the alcohol. Hiccup. They’re for taste, silly. Cyanide tastes worse than a basket of rotting eggs. There we go. My head is all clear and the annoying stupor is gone. God damn it. I got sulfur dust all over my new outfit.”
“What a devastating shame. But, when have you tasted cyanide? Uh, what are you doing, Adriana?” The younger immortal is starting to peel off her blue shirt when Startrix turns to look at her.
“Its called changing my clothes. You should try this particular activity one of these days. You can’t wear that gothic armor for eternity. Besides you used to be as beautiful as I am. So just calm down, old woman. Don’t forget that when I was a child, you were the one that gave me a bath. Well, that is until you got fired for leaving me alone in a large house. Father always was overprotective of me. The point is that my naked body is nothing new to you.”
“It is not new to anybody. Most men that are alive in every galaxy have seen you in the buff.”
“Shut up about my freaking private life, Startrix! How many times do I have to hear those slut comments? So, I like spending a lot of my time with men. Just because it’s true doesn’t mean you can keep talking about it! Now, what did you want to know about?” says Adriana while she wriggles into her usual dark pink bodysuit. She starts pouring the simmering potion into seven large cups of silver and then the last of it goes into a jewel-encrusted goblet.
“You seem to know about the effects and uses of cyanide very intimately. It is something I have wondered about for years. Considering you have used it in every potion that you ever made,” states Startrix.
“Well, it is a rather funny story if you think about it. When I was eighteen, my father took me to this big feast for some political big shot in Rome. It might have been for that egomaniac called Julius Caesar, but I don’t remember, or care, because he isn’t important. Anyway, Cybro was there and he had tried to poison one of the important guests with cyanide. I accidentally drank the cup of poison and became very sick. Every doctor in Rome tried to discover how I survived. Cybro was especially angry once he found out that his plan was foiled. He still hates it when I mention this story. Does that answer your question, old friend?”
“More or less. Cybro must really hold a grudge if he still hates you for that incident. But it is time for the meeting. Do you think they will go along with your plan?”
“Of course they will. I am their leader and my plan is nearly perfect. Aside from that, they don’t have much of a choice. Just one thing, Startrix.”
“What?”
“If you make one more sex joke toward me, you’ll need a lot more than your full platemail armor to protect you. Understand?”
“Crystal clear,” mumbles the eerie female as she follows the blond immortal into the blood red hallway.
Final Fantasy
Coming right over! Wow . . . You definitely came to the right place. No adventure would survive wearing regular clothes. I’m surprised nobody jumped you for that shiny sword, especially in this part of town. Now, let’s go into the back and get an idea of what we’re working with. Please keep your clothes on, sir.
Seems we’re looking at speed and stealth given your build and weapon. That means no heavy armors even with magic to making them lighter. Our products have a limit to the amount of spells they can hold before their integrity dissolves. Even one that is enhanced to be more durable will start to fall apart if you put too much on there. So, the best we can get platemail to is about a quarter of its weight and that’s only if you do nothing more than spells to make it lighter. Chainmail might work, but I’d recommend leather. We also have hide, scale, wooden plate, fur, this black shiny one, cardboard, paper, loincloth only, and evil vampire tooth. Wicker too if you don’t make getting laughed at. Leather is a good choice and now we’ll move on to modifications.
No, not magical. There’s plenty we can do before we start flinging spells around. I assure you that our methods are not actually flinging. So, we can go with smooth leather or one with studs around the chest and shoulders. There are suits that you attach over your clothes in pieces or full armor with clothes sewn inside. For you, I would go with the former in case you have to switch out quickly. Oh, you’re not an assassin? Then, the latter could work out. If you’re willing to wait for an extra three days, we can sew chainmail patches over your vital areas like the heart and liver. No to the groin because that can lead to things getting caught down there. I think we can put a few metal plates in there as long as they’re not big enough to bring down your flexibility. Along the spine? That would take an extra week and you staying here for measurements. We’d have to craft each piece to exactly your body, which isn’t easy.
Now for the magic. What do you want? Well, we can do almost anything, so there’s no point in going through a long list. Talk to me and I’ll let you know if it’s possible. Small force field to cover your head? It will only blow non-magical weapons that aren’t any bigger than a longsword. A great maul will sends your skull into the next village. Warning sense is a popular item. We have it in psychic message, uneasy feeling, ear buzz, itchiness, strange sneeze, or sweating in the direction of the danger. Last one isn’t very popular, but it is subtle, so good choice. Self-repair is a big one and would be the only other thing that you put on. Look, magical armor is hard to damage in the first place and we have a warranty. Blinding flash and a perfect direction sense, especially when heading home. I get the sense that you’re the type to get lost or run if things get too dangerous. That’s not a bad thing, buddy. Means you’ll live longer.
That’s really all we need to go over. Few minor things like if you want matching boots and gloves with the suit. Also, let us know if you want any special emblems, which you can come back to us for. We’re always happy to personalize stuff in more ways than spells. What’s in that bag? It’s our first time customer gift. You get our card, a stone to contact us in emergencies once a month, armor polish, armor oil, clean rags, repair kit, next of kin notification form, and shoulder clips in case you want a cape. You’d be surprised how often that last one comes up. Now let’s get to measuring . . . Please pull your pants back up, sir.
With me on the blog today is another of my classmates, the awesome Nora Shalaway Carpenter (woot woot). Nora has been here before (click here) and is…
Check This Out: Rural Voices
Hi, SEers. Mae here today for my first post of 2021! I hope all of you had a spectacular New Year. Let’s hope 2021 is going to be FAR BETTER than the…
When You’re Stuck: WIP Staying Power
Cover art by Jason Pedersen
Welcome to the three songs of Legends of Windemere: The Merchant of Nevra Coil. This was the first of 2 books that just appeared in my mind after I began publishing the series. It means there aren’t many notes on these two stories and I made them for specific reasons. The purpose of this book was to focus more on Yola Biggs the exiled Chaos Goddess, who is with Baron Kernaghan. I wanted to have her to more than mischief in the background and give her some evolution as well. This helped set things up for when she takes a bigger role in a later story. I got to do more with the gnomes, Nyx, Trinity, and a bunch of other smaller things that could have become hanging plot holes if I left them alone for too long. Anyway, let’s get to the crazy fun since Yola seemed to commandeer 2 of the 3 songs.
This ‘Mad Hatter’ by Melanie Martinez, which I first ran into with the above Anime Music Video. I used this because the real video seemed a little too much for some people in my regular audience. Anyway, Yola Biggs is crazy and unpredictable. Her antics are at the core of the chaos that ensues in this story. A part of this song that I thought worked best for her is that she’s proud of being unhinged.
This goes for Yola Biggs too. It’s ‘Unstable’ by Chaotica and the rapid speed made me think of how she operates. This one also connects to the section that takes place in what would be a psych ward. Of course, this goes into full disaster and the minor instability becomes a massive upheaval. Guess being unstable is a big part of this story even though it stay under the surface.
I was trying hard not to give all the songs to Yola and insanity. Once I switched my mind to the gnomes and their flying city, I realized that there was a song. A perfect song for that entire species. There you have it.
(Post originally made on January 6, 2020. That’s staying power.)
Joan of Arc
Various questions come up when someone wants to write high fantasy and many of them are completely understandable. They may deal with magic, various races, and creating a world that isn’t Earth. Yet, there are other questions that you can see why they are asked, but they come off as shocking. It makes one wonder about the entire genre and how it might not have evolved as much as many believe. I’m going to touch on one of those questions here:
Does a fantasy story have to take place in a medieval Europe/Dark Ages setting?
The obvious answer is ‘No’.
As long as the genre doesn’t require a specific setting type like Westerns and WWII dramas, you can do whatever you want. Even those ‘restrictive’ areas have some wiggle room, so nothing is set in stone. The rules are incredibly flexible with fantasy, which really only requires that there be a magical, mystical element that can’t be chalked up to science. This means you can do the traditional medieval setting or take inspiration from any time period. You can also ignore that and try to make something entirely from scratch. It is much more important to make the world work than to follow what you believe is a genre trend.
It isn’t hard to see why people think it should be medieval worlds or expect them to run the way our history did. Tolkien and Lewis set that standard, which tends to go along without many changes when you look at the big ones. ‘Game of Thrones’, ‘Dungeons & Dragons’, and even series that take place on a future Earth that has magic seem to go for the European aesthetic. Castles with kings and knights traveling in search of adventure or a dragon to rescue from a fire-breathing princess. You’re going to find more series that follow this tradition than blatantly go against it. So, new authors get the feeling that this is a requirement instead of a suggestion that most people take. Although, can you really blame them?
I’ve seen many readers go after a fantasy book because it isn’t historically accurate. A suit of platemail isn’t correct or rules of etiquette don’t meant with medieval standards. You can have a reader complain that the heroes are bathing regularly or that there are indoor bathrooms. Had those tossed my way a few times. As soon as you have the set pieces of medieval Europe, you’re bound to have people assuming that it will be Earth history accurate. This doesn’t make much sense to me when it’s a place like Windemere, which isn’t Earth. Yes, they have settings similar to the traditional, but they also have more modern things like the emergence of indoor plumbing. This means you can’t suddenly say that something isn’t supposed to be that way because it could very well be right since it isn’t Earth.
Well, that’s my opinion and statement on this. I’m going to be playing more with the idea when I finally get to the fantasy tip book. What do you think about the belief that fantasy stories need to be in medieval Europe?
