Stumbled onto this and had to do a post about it. Like many people, I grew up on Sesame Street. I believe the group up top is the cast I grew up with since Elmo wasn’t around that much. This was the 1980’s. The show has been around for a long time and appears in multiple countries, which is amazing. My son was never heavy into ‘Sesame Street’, but was into the ‘Elmo’s World’ part. Wonder what the show will be like when he has kids since I assume it’ll out last us all.
So, do any other people have fond memories of this show? My favorite was the big reveal that Snuffleupagus was real. That was probably my first big plot twist/shift when watching a show.
This week was crazier than expected and I’m not counting the election results in that statement. Not going to get into that chaos . . . Again. Anyway, I’ll try to recap a week where nothing writing-wise got done.
Look, I tried to do some editing, but I didn’t see a few things coming:
Monday
I got an email on Sunday that there were parent-teacher conferences for my son on this evening. It was ‘first come, first serve’, so I got there early while my son studied for his unit math test, math quarterly, and science quarterly. This event took most of the evening, so I just went home to watch a cartoon with my son then crawl into bed. I mean, I had Tuesday off, right?
Tuesday
Election Day, but also virtual training for work. My son studied with my mom while I wen through the training. That was the entire morning and we had an appointment in the afternoon. So, it was all of that with a lunch in the middle. Afterwards, it was going home with dinner and studying some more. Also, I started my online defensive driving course.
Wednesday
Work . . . Schedule got changed due to needs again. Tension and high emotions due to the election. By the time I got home, I was drained and handling texts from people who had stuff to say. Got some Pokemon Go in that evening then it was home for more defensive driving course before bed.
Thursday
Work . . . Pokemon Go . . . Appointment . . . Dinner . . . Defensive driving course. Oh, one of my headlight bulbs went out, so I had to work with my dad to change it at 8 PM. This was done in the dark and I came back to find that I left the online course running. So, I had to take extra time to get myself logged back in.
Friday
Work . . . Appointment . . . Finished defensive driving course. Crawled into bed after all that to whimper myself to sleep due to other issues. Seriously, this week ended up being more emotionally taxing than I expected.
I really did hope to finish editing chapter 10 of Darwin & the Demon Game. It was short and I thought I’d have some evenings free. Couldn’t even pull it off last night after finishing the course and writing this post. My hope is to get it done this morning and start in on Chapter 11 (that’s ominous). There is a Pokemon Go event going on, but I did all of the research. An event runs from 2-5 tomorrow, but I can use the morning to get even more done. There’s also having Monday off for Veteran’s Day, so I can edit before I get my son at 9:30 AM. It’s still looking like I won’t finish this until late December unless I can finally get a few of my evenings back.
Another issue is that I have no idea what to watch on TV right now. Don’t feel like live-action or hour long episodes due to my crazy schedule. Seriously, it’s like every weekday has an appointment. Oh wait, they do for the next week or so. Can’t choose an anime that is interesting me either. Simply not feeling motivated to do anything. Really, I’ve just gone numb after this week. Probably not a good sign, but I have therapy to help me through it.
This coming week is going to be a crapshoot as far as time. Got my son on Monday, Tuesday, and next weekend. Wednesday is solidly booked and Thursday only has an evening appointment after work. I might try to do the daily Pokemon Go stuff Thursday morning in the cold in order to clear up the afternoon for editing. That or I get into work early to edit before other people arrive then do more while I’m waiting for the appointment to start. Totally an option that I might have to attempt in order to cover all of the stuff I want to do that day.
I’m just going to dive right into the goal list:
Edit at least 2 chapters of Darwin & the Demon Game
Get fresh air with Pokemon Go
Enjoy time with son when he’s here
Remember to take Dramamine before we play Lego Jurassic World
Buy pineapple or strawberries for one of my lunches.
Let me clarify. It isn’t if you don’t want to publish. These questions deal with situations where you aren’t able to publish. Maybe you can’t afford cover art or lack the time to properly edit. Maybe you don’t have the time to promote it, so you don’t want to put it out until you can give it some attention. The reasons are endless and personal. So . . .
How would you keep your confidence up during a period where you can’t publish?
Would you continue writing new books or stick to the old ones?
How would you handle the ‘just do it’ statements when you simply can’t do it?
I know this will ruffle some feathers. I’ve seen many people say that they don’t care about the opinions of others. They write and publish for themselves. Doesn’t matter what any says. These authors don’t care. At least, that’s how they come off, but I believe you can’t publish a book without caring about what people think. Let me explain while you get your torches and pitchforks ready.
If one is truly only writing for themselves then they wouldn’t bother sharing it for others to see. The moment an artist allows others to see their work, a part of them is exposed to outside opinions. It’s unavoidable. If the audience loves it then the artist gains pride and confidence. If the audience hates it, the artist can reevaluate their creation or just get depressed. This is part of being social creatures and taking a step out of the herd to show off something we put our heart and soul into. Even if you’re not aware of wanting some praise, a part of you really does want recognition from at least one person without a connection to you. It means you made a positive effect on a stranger.
Now, the ‘I do not care about opinions’ tends to appear when negative reviews and general criticism comes up. This is a tricky thing because some of these opinions shouldn’t be cared about. You know the ones, right? Insults, mockery, unfair comparisons, and full on attempts to break the artist. Totally different from creative criticism, which one doesn’t always have to take. I would agree that the hurtful opinions shouldn’t be cared about and given any fuel. Yet, they are a part of publishing a book and allowing someone else to read it. That part of you that wants recognition creates exposure to this side of the coin since nobody gets 100% positive reactions.
I really don’t believe it’s wrong to care about the opinions of others, including outside of art. Depends on the source and intentions of the opinions. Those designed to hurt shouldn’t be taken to heart since that gives the bully what they want. On the opposite side, opinions of empty praise don’t really help beyond artificially inflating an ego. That can lead to an artist never improving and possibly stepping into an echo chamber to avoid criticism. It’s everything in the middle that one should at least consider, especially when it involves publishing a work. Otherwise, why bother even paying attention to reviews either good or bad? In that case, why publish if you don’t really care what other people think and don’t concern yourself with feedback?
Part of my thoughts on this topic is wondering why some authors publicly deny that they care about opinions. Is it true? I considered that until I saw a few of them get upset about negative feedback then go back to not caring. So, maybe this is just a defense mechanism these authors have created. A wall of apathy to block whatever is attacking until the threat is gone and they can open their souls up for criticism/praise again. We all have our own ways of handling the barbs of critics, so this could just be one of them. No idea if it’s healthier than taking time off to cry, whine, and feel like you made a mistake ever putting a pen to paper or finger to keyboard. Whatever gets an author through the day and continuing to write, I guess.
Again, this is all an opinion, which I guess shouldn’t upset those who don’t care about such things. Yet, it’s totally human to do so. The whole social animal thing means we care about the opinions of others on some level. We just might not like what we end up hearing, which is different than not caring in the first place. Gotta take the bad with the good when you publish and put yourself out there. It’s just what happens when you reveal a project you’ve put your heart and soul into. Not everyone will like it and you can’t really target only those who will love it. Just how it goes.
Always enjoyed this scene from Legends of Windemere: The Compass Key. I should have characters get trapped and do battle in their brains more often. Though, this was an aspect of Sari still being mentally damaged, which is something that I don’t feel I ever got her over. She really did end up being the silent sufferer because her personality was primarily about making others happy while ignoring her own pain. Guess that is fairly realistic with some people who make others life and nobody notices they are in bad shape until it’s too late. Wow. This got dark.
I think any person who has announced their dream and tried to accomplish it has been told to quit. Artists especially are routinely dragged down under the guise of saving them from themselves. They are only left alone after they quit or if they actually make a solid living off their art. Staying in-between only creates more grief because it’s impossible to avoid naysayers with the Internet. You need to market yourself on there, which means you open yourself up to the barbs.
Friends and I have talked a lot about what drives a person to do this, especially if they’re a friend or family. The latter tends to be really bad even though we hear about celebrities who made it because their family believed in them. I would say for every supportive family that helped an artist reach success there has to be at least 100 who fought to stop their loved ones from pursuing a risky path. That’s what it really comes down to in these scenarios. People know that achieving your dream in the arts is difficult, but they don’t really understand the years of work that go into it. Many expect it to be a simple act of being discovered with little to no effort by the artist, which is partially caused by fictional stories depicting this scenario. So, they end up trying to dissuade an artist from something that they don’t think they can accomplish.
People outside of the family/friends group could be acting out of bitterness for not making it themselves. There are many out there who know they failed to achieve their dreams and take out their anger on others. It can reach a point where they become happy at the failures of others, which makes them rather dangerous towards new artists who are still getting their footing.
If it isn’t bitterness then it’s a belief that nobody can make it without being born into the right family and era. You need the contacts, money, and nurturing necessary to achieve your dream even if you don’t have the talent. Sadly, there is some truth to this. Look at some of the most famous people around and how a big part of their success was being born to the right family. Nepotism and huge inheritances have created many of the big names we know of now. For anyone who fought and struggled with no success, seeing people who already have wealth and fame achieve their dream can be crushing. Personally, I’ve felt this whenever I saw ads for a celebrity publishing a fiction book or the old Top 100 lists being dominated by new editions of juggernaut franchises. It’s like the top of the heap is already full and will never have space for anyone born outside those ranks.
A reason I keep thinking about this phrase is because it had been said so much to me over the years. Sometimes by fellow authors. I fought against it for a long time, but it’s harder to ignore these days. My books don’t sell. I can’t carve out any time for editing or writing because life is too busy. Probably be that way for years if it ever changes. I know people have told me that I’ll get back into it, but what kind of skills or drive will I have left if I give up for a few years. The spark of creativity isn’t eternal. It needs to be fed and kept alive or it will die. Whatever comes back probably won’t be as potent, especially if you reach an age where your mental facilities aren’t as sharp. God knows Covid did a number on my brain a few years back, so I don’t want to know what it’ll be like if I wait a few years to let aging and stress join in the fun. All of this makes me feel like there is a time limit on how long one can pursue their dreams. At least these days where retirement doesn’t look like a possibility, which means that avenue is closed off.
So, I wonder if the people who told me quit have finally gotten their way. I’ve said this before and even pointed out that there are some who actually sabotaged me in the past with pretty good success. With work and parenting taking up so much time, I can’t recover what I lost. By the time things even remotely settle, the publishing landscape will have changed and I’ll be back at square one. Even now, there isn’t much attention given to indie publishing in the public eye. All I hear people talk about are the usual franchises that have sucked most of the oxygen out of their connected genres. It’s sad to think that the statement in the title is almost an inevitability for the majority of artists.
That’s really it here. I’m sure people will have other opinions and be more positive than I am. For me, it took me 2 months to type in edits this summer. This is just reading my books, editing, and typing in the changes. Not full on writing. So, it isn’t that I want to quit. It’s that I’m not being given much of a choice
