Traditional publishing has its benefits, but so does indie publishing.
However, those benefits are meaningless if you don’t take advantage of them.
One of the great advantages of indie publishing is the opportunity to swiftly respond to the many changes that arise throughout a book’s life, and to give a book an extended lifetime that far exceeds typical shelf life.
How’s the Weather?
Even in the publishing industry, the weather is unpredictable.
Many factors come up, including those that are beyond your control.
Kindle changes the way that series books are displayed in search results.
Just as you begin your big promotion, one of your first reviews stings like a bumblebee.
The subject of your nonfiction book experiences a major change just months after it’s published. Now it’s outdated.
Amazon discontinues the 4-for-3 program, starts discounting paperbacks, or stops putting them on sale.
Welcome, good customer, to The Pen Is! Why do people keep laughing at our name? It’s part of a great saying and fits what we do here very well. Do we sell pens? Of course, but that’s only part of our merchandise. Yes, they come in different colors and we have various sizes of notebooks. You think it’s all paper, ink, and words? There’s a lot more to writing than the physical pieces and that’s what we have to offer. Yes, we had books on how to write and I’m getting the feeling that you’ll need at least three of those. Come with me and we’ll give you the starter pack.
First, you’ll need to purchase a reason to be an author. Trust me when I say ‘because I wanna’ won’t cut it if you get any attention. What? Don’t go too far with a parent’s dying wish or something so dramatic unless it’s true. No, don’t poison a family member to make it real. Are you going to be a horror or thriller author? Cookbooks . . . I’m sorry I asked. I suggest going with the good, old reason of ‘I hope to share my knowledge’ since you’re going for non-fiction. Fictional cookbooks? In that case, talk about wanting to bring smiles to the faces of children who will destroy kitchens across the nation. It doesn’t matter if the recipes are fake because kids will try anything.
Now, you’ve already picked a genre, but is that what you’ll stay in? If not then you may want to buy a few pen names. We have a sale right now that’s ‘Buy 4, Get a 5th Surname Free’. With each pen name, we give you a photo and contact information. It’s up to you to maintain them and keep everything separate. For an extra payment, we can give you biographies for each one, but that’s only if you can’t think of anything yourself. How do we come up with the names? That’s rather simple. We interview you and look into your background. Each name will come from a different aspect of your life and designed to not crossover. For example, one name might come from your mother’s maiden name and a favorite animal. The other can stem from your love of Nikola Tesla and Jim Henson. How did I know about that? Trade secret that has nothing to do with your Tesla shirt and Muppets wristwatch.
We have some other tools that a new author might find helpful. A personal favorite is the ‘Anti-Response Unit’. This is a necklace that you wear when reading a negative review and the device activates when you say ‘one star’, ‘two star’, or ‘troll’. It remains active for two hours and cannot be taken off until it shuts down. A scanner reads what you’re looking at and if it notices that you’re going to respond to the negative review, it zaps you with enough voltage to numb your teeth. This way, you won’t do anything in anger and cause trouble for yourself. If you want this then you need to fill out the legal forms that relieve us of all liability and give us a doctor’s note that says you have no known heart conditions. It is also not a guarantee that you won’t cause a fight later on after the two hours because you retain your free will. Yes, we used to have a device that took care of that, but there was this whole morality issue. Look, just try to stay out of trouble. The ‘report’ and ‘flag’ buttons are there for a reason, but make sure it isn’t a real review before you make some waves.
There are other things if you want to browse. Sure we have some caffeine pills and other items to help you pull off a late night. We even have an elixir that gives you a jolt of energy and clarity when you get near the end of your book. Use it only when you’re only the last ten to twenty pages and when you know you won’t be interrupted. Otherwise, you’ll sputter to a stop at the worst possible moment. Yes, we have a sucking candy that takes away the pain of editing and makes that stage enjoyable. They come in a variety of flavors including whiskey, absinthe, matzoh ball soup, and raven. You’d be surprised how often we’re out of that last one once October hits.
Just remember that we have all you could ever want in ‘The Pen Is . . .’ Again with the childish snickering?
Truth is subjective, and so when I say true, you should take it with a grain of salt.
Okay, bottom line? Charles never really interviewed Penny and I, and so the words coming out of “Charles’ mouth” here are also just the coinage of my brain, as is the suggestion that Charles is anything like James Lipton from Inside the Actor’s Studio.
However, everything that I say is absolutely, one hundred percent true. Except for when I’m stretching the truth for the sake of narrative, or telling outright porky pies.
Without further ado, I present to you, Inside the Author’s Studio, hosted by Charles E. Yallowitz (in the guise of James Lipton. You know. This guy.) With special guests, Helena Hann-Basquiat and her strange but lovely niece, the Countess Penelope of Arcadia.
Charles: Thank you for coming, Helena; Penny.
Helena: Thank you, Charles. May I call you Charlie?
Charles: No.
Penny: Can I? Or how ’bout Chuck?
Charles: I’d really prefer Charles, if you don’t mind. Now, tell us about your new book, Memoirs of a Dilettante Volume One.
Helena: Well, it’s really unconventional, darling. It’s not a novel, and it’s not a straight biography, either. It’s got autobiographical aspects, but it’s also an experiment with narrative. I poke fun of conventional writing, flaunting the fact that I often ignore a lot of dos and don’ts of writing, and I think that a lot of people are going to miss that. It’s not going to make sense to them, or they’re going to get lost in my many diversions and digressions. So it’s been both rewarding and frustrating trying to find an audience for my writing. Those who get it, love it and are enthusiastic about it, and those who don’t, well…
Penny: Fuck ’em. Oh shit, can I say fuck on the air?
Charles: If you could limit your profanity, I’d very much appreciate it. Can you do that?
Penny: Hell, yes!
Helena: (shaking her head) Never underestimate the power of an obscure Simpsons reference.
Charles: Indeed. So, why self-publish? Why not try to find a home for this book with a publishing house?
Helena: Because I’m impatient. Weren’t expecting that answer, were you? I’ve got so many other ideas, and Memoirs of a Dilettante is only one of them. And I know it’s terribly odd, and a tough sell, and so I wanted to get it out there and have complete creative control over it.
Charles: Then why do the Kickstarter campaign? Why raise money for a book that you knew traditional publishers weren’t going to see?
Helena: You know, when Jim and I started the Kickstarter (that’s my friend Jim Squires, who launched the whole thing) we weren’t sure if it would be successful. Or rather, Jim said he was, but as we went into week two, and the pledges slowed to a stop, I started trying to wrap my mind around the possibility that it would fail. That’s when Jim told me that the point of the Kickstarter wasn’t to raise money, but to raise awareness. Thankfully, in the end, we were successful, and I count that as a win, but the fact of the matter is, all the Kickstarter did for me financially was allow me to buy a box of books to use for either promotional purposes or to sell at indie writer events or shows. Which is not bad.
Penny: Aunt Helena is a terrible pessimist, Chuck.
Charles: Um, it’s Charles.
Penny: I’ll let you call me Penelope if you let me call you Chuck.
Charles: Well, if you be my bodyguard, I can be your long lost pal
Penny: (squealing with delight) I can call you Betty, and Betty when you call me…
Charles: …you can call me Al.
(At this point in the interview, Charles and Penny launched into an impromptu version of Paul Simon’s classic, “You Can Call Me Al.” Here, darlings, play along at home:)
Penny: As I was saying, Aunt Helena is a terrible pessimist. She was driving me posalutely bat guano, checking the Kickstarter page every fifteen minutes, and then cursing a blue streak when nothing changed. The fact of the matter is, from the time she wrote that first amazing post (co-starring yours truly in the land of le boisson chaud — careful with those Bs and Ps, you don’t accidentally want to order a hot fish) to the time she published was almost exactly one year. That means she wrote, edited, formatted, promoted, ran a successful fundraising campaign, grew her audience from exactly ZERO people to somewhere much greater than ZERO (who cares about numbers) all in one year. And I’m not even going to mention all the other stuff she did during that year. Oh hell, yes I am. She’s also got about 3/4 of that creepy swamp novel done, too, and is probably only about three or four stories away (if that) from finishing Volume Two of the Memoirs. And it’s taken its toll on her.
Charles: In what way?
Penny: She’s stressed out. All that self-promotion, it was, like, murder on Aunt Helena. She’ll promote the hell out of someone else, but when it comes to herself, she finds it, I dunno, distasteful. I think that if Helena had her way, she’d lock herself up in her room, blast Smiths records all day, and just write, write, write, write.
Helena: That’s not true. I wouldn’t just listen to The Smiths.
Penny: Right. You’d switch it up with some Morrissey. Whatever. What Aunt Helena really needs is some rich benefactor to just pay her to write.
Helena: Where’s Andy Warhol when you need him?
Charles: So what are the alternatives?
Helena: Finding balance. I get fixated on pouring all my energy into one thing at a time, and when I get spread out, I can’t handle the strain. The whole month the Kickstarter was going on, every waking moment (and sometimes when I was asleep) was consumed with raising the funds. When I launched the Kickstarter with Jim, I just figured that I’d put it out there, Tweet reminders every so often, and that people would come and pledge. But what I encountered was that launching the Kickstarter was almost akin to self-publishing a book on Amazon and not doing any promotion at all. I needed to sell the Kickstarter! Which felt like doing all the work twice. There were all kinds of people who had never heard of it, or weren’t comfortable with it, or didn’t understand how it worked. In the end, I felt like I was a telemarketer, haranguing people and hocking myself. And that’s not what I wanted to be doing. Promotion is much harder work than writing.
Charles: Promotion is a big part of publishing. Do you think you’d do it again? Self-publish, and Kickstarter?
Helena: I think I will self-publish Volume Two of the Memoirs, and I am looking into other crowdfunding platforms, some specifically tailored to writers, as well as some other ongoing funding options. There are subscription type services that some writers are using, which makes sense to me — I’ve been giving away for free what other writers charge for. I just have to be patient and continue building an audience.
Charles: And how do you do that?
Helena: Hell if I know. Continue to write quality material, and hope the word spreads. Actively seek out other writers and build rapport with that. I’d say “find a community” but I’ve got community — I’m just not much of a joiner. I want people to like my writing without necessarily feeling the need to be my friend. I can only handle so many friends. Does that make me sound like a bitch?
Penny: A little bit.
Helena: Then I’m a bitch. No, I’m not. I just can’t be stretched too thin. Accept what I can give you — and sometimes that’s just my stories. I’ve said it before, and I’ve said it again. You don’t know me. I’m a writer. Helena’s a character. If you think you know me from my stories, let me remind you that I am a notoriously unreliable narrator, and what you think you know may not be exactly accurate. My life is not an open book. My writing is not meant to draw attention to the dilettante behind the curtain — it’s about the stories, and what they mean to you. If they make you laugh, if they make you cry, if they make you angry, let that be enough. But I’m a terrible friend — anyone who has read my stories should know that I have a tendency to run away any time someone gets too close. I am only a blogger by accident — I am first and foremost a writer. I started the blog just to have somewhere to develop an audience. I had no idea how big it would get.
Charles: So what’s next for the two of you?
Helena: Well, I’m going to try to dial things back a bit when it comes to blogging. Take some breaks to allow myself to write, and then make sure I schedule some time for reading and socializing in there. I’m doing my best to wrap up the Bayou story by the summertime, as well as compiling a Jessica B. Bell anthology of short stories, tentatively titled “Stories to Scare the Shit Out of You.” So it’s a dual purpose entertainment/laxative.
Penny: And I’m going to try to nab a rich and generous husband and convince him to support Aunt Helena in all her artistic endeavours. And then stage an accident, collect the insurance/inheritance, retire to the Bahamas, and join a calypso band. But you probably shouldn’t leave that last bit in. You’re going to edit this, right?
Charles: Actually, we’re live. And that’s all the time we have for today’s show. Tune in next time when our guests will be the ghosts of Norman Mailer and Sylvia Plath engaging in a debate on Feminism. Thanks for tuning in to Inside the Author’s Studio.
Memoirs of a Dilettante Volume One was published April 1st, and is available in paperback HERE (if it’s not available in your region, try HERE) or for Kindle HERE
Thank you, Charles, for hosting me on your site today, and for letting me put words in your mouth***
*** This insinuates that I asked, but I didn’t, though I’m confident Charles would have given consent had he known about it.
One more thank you to everyone who participated in our blog tour for Voices of Nature. We are so grateful for your willingness to spread the news.
Stars Above (alouette)
Starry nights shine bright
Thousands of wee lights
Constellations light the sky
Darkness shows contrast
While clouds have gone past
Suspended in time up high
Pisces and Leo
Taurus and Virgo
Constellations light the sky
Sagittarius
Libra, Pegasus
Worlds of tiny lights float by
Today’s poem is from Voices of Nature co-authored with Kirsten. Check out our book.
And don’t forget Dreams of Love – it is a collection of poems for lovers. See reviews here
We see and hear this question a lot: Why do you write?
The funny thing is that I’ve seen some people answer this question differently every time it’s asked. Typically, this is part of an interview, so we feel like there’s limited space to answer. Maybe that’s why an author plunges their hand into the bag of ‘why’ and pulls only one of the reason out. It’s unfortunate because an author who answers ‘I do it for the love of words’ one time and says ‘to pay the bills’ a few months later can get labeled as a hypocrite. Then the backtracking occurs even though they were correct both times. It might even be that reasons change.
Personally, I write because I love writing and enjoy sharing my stories. That’s the main reason and I think every person has a core reason. Other answers come about to connect to the core, so I can’t really ignore them. I do want to make enough money to live on with my writing. Through this, I can continue writing full-time and more of my stories can come to light. I won’t deny that part of me wants to leave a literary legacy behind as well, which is why I’m trying to create a vast world with Windemere. Only one series that I have planned will appear outside of Windemere and only because it’s in outer space. This could change if I feel that I’m not up to tackling science-fiction due to my lack of science knowledge and desire to explain the inner workings of some tech. Finally, I truly can’t see myself doing anything except writing. So, it boils down to:
Love of writing.
Desire to bring escapist joy to others.
Money.
Leaving a legacy.
Don’t know any better.
So, one could say that it really isn’t a simple, cut-and-dry answer for me. Though that’s just me. I’ve met people who really do boil down to a single reason such as ‘easy way to make money’, ‘easy way to get famous’, or ‘I have a story to tell’.
What are your reasons for taking on the mantle of author/writer? I’ll be making a post at the end of the week with everyone’s answer unless a person requests not to be included.
The song has nothing to do with this. It simply started up on Pandora when I began writing and I really like it.
Now, I’ve mentioned a few times that I wanted to do an ‘Excerpt Week’, but I was scared of setting of the ‘Spoiler’ fight again. This sentiment seems to be what gets comments instead of any excerpt suggestions. So, I’ve come up with this plan and figured I’d warn people who are terrified of even tiny teasers:
Last Week in May– Hero Debut Excerpts. From Nyx and Luke’s first meeting to the great debut of Fritz and Bessaria. This week will end with the first appearance of the 5th Champion.
Last Week in June– Villain Debut Excerpts. From the Lich and Hellfire Elf to Trinity and maybe a few monsters. I might even slip in the infamous ‘Luke & the Spurge’ scene from Prodigy of Rainbow Tower. This will end with an excerpt of the ‘Big Baddie’.
Last Week in July– Favorite action scenes. From Fizzle in a special book 6 fight to Timoran Vs General Vile, this will hopefully lead into the action-packed debut of The Compass Key. This will end with the blog debut of ‘Bob’ and show him in one of his most heinous scenes.
Now, here’s the problem. I can’t promote future books without revealing a few things about the prior books. I tried with Book 3 and it was tough and I couldn’t do it at all with Book 4. I leave some secrets in the pages, but central characters like ‘Bob’, ‘Big Baddie’, and the 5th Champion are nearly impossible to hide when promoting a book. They can be in the blurb that I hope to get feedback on along with other incidents. So, reveals are becoming an occupational hazard if I want to continue. All I can say to those scared about knowing too much and continue reading my blog:
“It isn’t the destination, but the journey. Even if you know an event will happen, you don’t know everything about it. Might be more to things than you realize.”
Add on: I’ll ask again because I’m big on audience participation: Any requests for specific character debuts or fight scenes?
