Having a John Wick-end (I Give All Credit to My Friend Who Said It First.)

It was a busy week, but I’m happy to say that I get to rest a bit this weekend.  A friend is coming over and we’ve been holding off on seeing ‘John Wick 3’ until we could do a marathon.  My son is at his mom’s, so we watched the first two movies last night and are probably seeing the third in a bit.  It’s nice to not be alone during this time even if it’s only for 1.5 days.  I’ll be alone tomorrow and will try to get some writing done.  Probably should mow the lawn at some point before velociraptors move into the tall grass.  Not really in the mood for that.

Last weekend was a lot of fun with my son since we had the big zoo trip and then relaxed for a bit.  Don’t think it was enough for me in terms of resting since I’ve felt drained all week.  Not good when I’m already dozing off around 10 AM.  Got a feeling it’s more the emotional toll since I was getting my normal amount of sleep.  After revealing that I’m going through a divorce, I had hoped things would feel better.  Yet, I feel even more beleaguered than before.  Part of it is probably because I still haven’t carved out the time to sit and think.  Not sure it would even help since my mind decides to use the brief moments of solitude to make up for not writing.  There is just so much that I still don’t know here, but I probably never will.

I managed to get a little writing done last weekend, but it was only one section.  Means I have exactly 12 sections left to go on War of Nytefall: Eradication.  I don’t think I’m going to finish before the summer break.  I can get 3 done tomorrow and maybe 2 or 3 on Wednesday.  (Add-on: Never mind on tomorrow. Apparently, I was chosen to do extra training for summer.  That seals the deal.  Not going to finish before summer.  Why do I even bother building hope for these things?) After that, I’m stuck because I have a weekend with my son, summer job training, Father’s Day, and then I dive into the summer job.  I might have to whittle down the number or just write the finale during the July 4th weekend.  That’s nearly a month between sessions, which is driving me nuts.  Part of me is swearing that this is the worst book I ever wrote because of these insanely long breaks.  People keep telling me to make time or that it isn’t so bad, but I find that I don’t remember my twists and turns by the time I get back to my story.  At this rate, I might be looking at one release a year or simply hanging up the notebooks because I just can’t get the balance right.  It doesn’t help that so many writing days have been undermined by drama or people who suddenly think I shouldn’t be left alone and make plans with me.  This is really just adding to my overall stress and feelings of failure.

Thank you to everyone who voted in the Teaser Tuesday poll.  I’m thinking of scheduling 19 posts with each vote being an entry.  This means Ichabod Brooks gets 6, Lost gets 3, and then a few 2’s and 1’s.  I’m actually surprised that Quest of the Broken-Hearted got 2 votes.  Since I can only take so much before Amazon gets testy (my books are still KDP), I’m going to probably search older Teaser Tuesdays and reuse for a few.  This will have to be done especially for Ichabod Brooks since 6 is a large amount.  Looking at the calendar, this will give me teasers until mid-October.  That’s a big weight off my mind and gives me more time to figure something out for post-Bedlam Thursday.  Hope people enjoy what I post even if they’ve seen it before.

Nothing else to really talk about.  Got a bunch of July posts done and will do more on the nights where I can’t get into writing mode.  That’s happening a lot more often and I’m sure the summer will be the same.  If I can muster the mojo, I hope to get the planning for the ‘Fantasy Advice’ book done by the summer.  I can work on those entries even without chapter titles . . . Still can’t think of a book title.  Maybe I had one in a previous post, but I can’t remember.  Needs to be catchy and easy to search for, so nothing specific to Windemere.  Keep thinking I came up with ‘So, You Want to Write Fantasy?’  Not sure if that works.

Goals for the week:

  1. Time with son.
  2. Work.
  3. Mow the lawn.
  4. Do laundry.
  5. Write more of War of Nytefall: Eradication
  6. JOHN WICK 3!
  7. Hang more clothes on the exercise bike
  8. Fantasy tip notes if possible

About Charles Yallowitz

Charles E. Yallowitz was born, raised, and educated in New York. Then he spent a few years in Florida, realized his fear of alligators, and moved back to the Empire State. When he isn't working hard on his epic fantasy stories, Charles can be found cooking or going on whatever adventure his son has planned for the day. 'Legends of Windemere' is his first series, but it certainly won't be his last.
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31 Responses to Having a John Wick-end (I Give All Credit to My Friend Who Said It First.)

  1. twixie13 says:

    Hope you enjoy the movie! You deserve the relaxation time, given all that’s been going on.

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  2. Here’s to a good week next week. When is school finished?

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  3. C.E.Robinson says:

    Charles, take it as it comes! Trying to get organized for future things can be mind boggling. You may find time to write as you go along. Keep the balance, don’t lose those twists and turns. Have a great movie weekend! 📚 Christine

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    • The thing is that I’m tired of things coming. As far as writing goes, I can’t see a future if I can’t get any time. I planned for Sunday to be a day of progress and now it’s gone. It’s going to take me at least 7 months to finish a project that used to take me one. The breaks have made it that I can’t even be confident in the quality. Editing is going to be a nightmare too if this is how my life goes. I can’t edit one chapter and then disappear on it for a few weeks. The continuity wouldn’t be locked in. At some point I would love to stop being the universe’s punching bag.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. L. Marie says:

    Hope you have a great weekend. I’ve heard nothing but good things about John Wick 3. Enjoy!

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  5. How about ‘Fantasy Writing for the Faint of Heart’? 🙂 I’m sure you’ll come up with something.

    I read the advice once to write into a situation when you finish a session. Then, when you come back, you know a lot more of where you left off. You could at least leave a note or two about the twist. Everyone has his own approach, of course, so squish that idea down to where it works with yours. 🙂

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  6. Hope you enjoyed your movie, and no velociraptors move in before you can get to the lawn.

    Worrying about things too far in the future is only going to cause you more stress, and you’re dealing with enough of that already. As it is you have to figure out the work/writing/life balance while also dealing with a divorce, and a child with special needs. Cut yourself some slack… You’re coping better than some might with less to deal with.

    Regarding the writing: with how your situation is at the moment, about the only thing you can really do is write when you can, make notes about everything to try not to miss anything you need to do during the first draft, and then go through it once you’ve finished the first draft to check for all the things you’re worried about. Yes, that will mean taking longer again to get it published. But better slow progress, and another great book at the end of it, than any of the alternatives.

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    • Actually, we didn’t get to the movie. My new car died in the parking lot, so we had to wait for a tow. The engine began working again a minute after the movie started, but we headed home just to be safe.

      The thing with the writing is that there is slow progress and then there is broken progress. I’ve got the latter, which is a problem. The notes have been written and now it’s all about putting the story down with the right flow. If this is how my life is then I will never get it right. I will be spending years going back to the beginning because I don’t remember all of the nuances. It’s the middle book of a series too, which means it needs to connect to the past and prep for the future. I’m worried about the entire package not working because I disappear on the project for too long to notice. That is a major problem and a reason why many people with artistic ideas never get very far. They get bogged down with ‘life’ and have to designate their art as a hobby or just quit. The fact that I can’t even get one evening to write a week shows there is a problem.

      I’m genuinely tired of trying to get the work/writing/life balance in a world that doesn’t want me to have it. These freak accidents that remove ‘writing’ from my life even when I’ve planned stuff out are frustrating. Time and again, I have designated a day for writing and gotten everything I could do to clear it. What happens? Unexpected training, family visiting, a 24-hour bug, the ex-wife randomly contacting me for stuff she left behind, and a long list of other events that are beyond my control. At some point, it makes me wonder if I’m simply not supposed to be doing this. I don’t want to quit, but I really have trouble finding the strength to move on when the entire universe is against me. To be honest, I have not had a lick of success in anything for a long time. My newest book hasn’t even sold 20 copies even with the promos I did. I can’t garner reviews on anything and some people have even been blocked from doing so on Amazon because they were reported as my friends. In truth, they follow my blog and we talk in the comments. So, I really have a hard time seeing silver linings here since it feels like I’m always being knocked down.

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      • Sorry about the car issue making you miss the movie.

        That Amazon review issue is why I started just putting my reviews on Goodreads and my blog, and not on Amazon too.

        My point is, stressing over it only makes it feel even worse. Besides, there will always be something that comes up. You just have to find a way to cope with doing what you can, when you can. If that means it takes longer to get a book out, so be it. In other words, my point is that you’ll find a way, and beating yourself up over not having found it yet is only going to make things tougher on yourself, and make finding that way even more difficult, since you’ll be wasting precious writing time feeling bad for not having writing time. For now, just write when you can. Worry about what comes next later.

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      • I know many went to Goodreads. Yet, I don’t think your average reader is aware of the site. At least not that I’ve seen.

        I get what you’re saying, but what if something always comes up? This has gotten ridiculous in terms of derailment. It seems every week I have to battle against a new unexpected obstacle. It’s hard not to stress when you see a pattern of bad luck.

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      • I agree it’s hard. All I can say is, just do your best.

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  7. Just saw the comment about your car too. A lot of people are in a similar state right now. We’ve taken our own beatings with our son and his antics. I started writing in this state, so it’s easier for me to cope with. I lost an entire month of progress this Spring. Nothing you can do about it. Then I gained four or five quality days. It comes around. One release per year is nothing to sneeze at, and I’ve done that too. I might manage three this year, but remember Lanternfish was New Years Day, so it’s a bit of a cheat. You can do it too. I have faith in you.

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    • I took last August through December off in the hopes of things settling. That’s why I started again in January because I figured it wasn’t going to happen. Didn’t realize things would manage to get worse and hit ridiculous proportions like the car thing. I haven’t gotten got more than 2-3 quality days in the last 6 months, which is demoralizing. Not for lack of trying too. I’m actually being generous with the one release per year because I might not even get that if things contiue this way. Honestly, it’s just really hard to go from prolific to barely able to hold it together. I’m left wondering what it is I have to do to get any amount of peace or me time. The days I carve out end up getting stolen by ridiculous events that are beyond my control. I can’t even stumble onto quality days lately because I’m drained by the time I get to a quiet day. I really just need something to go my way and to catch some kind of break that isn’t a bone or my sanity. I mean, this weekend went to hell so quickly after I made this post that everyone around me could only say ‘What the fuck?’ The car was actually the final domino of a sitcom level series of events.

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Staci Troilo says:

    I’m so sorry about what you’re going through. It’s a lot; more than can be expressed in a few words. But your John-Wick-End seems like just the thing you need. Self-care is so important in times like these. And any progress in any project is a win. Celebrate those.

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    • Sadly, the John Wick-End didn’t work out as planned. We never got to the new movie because my new car died in the parking lot. We got it running again, but had to head home in case it was a fluke. Thing started up again a minute after the movie began too, which was insult to injury. Other events happened that just decimated this free day that I have now. I managed to get it back because I can’t go anywhere, but now I’m too emotionally exhausted to do much more than do chores. I’m repeatedly driven to this point too. How can a person do self-care when every attempt is met by disasters beyond their control?

      Liked by 1 person

      • Staci Troilo says:

        I’m sorry to hear that, Charles. It does sometimes feel like a domino effect. Maybe the self-care has to come in smaller bits at first—a cup of coffee on your back porch while you bird watch for five minutes. An episode of a show on Netflix while you enjoy a glass of wine. Work up to the zoo exhibits and movie outings later.

        I hope the car issue is resolved, though.

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      • Car issue can’t be resolved until tomorrow or Wednesday. Timing was terrible. The thing with the self-care is that even the smaller bits are getting destroyed. Spending a little time on a jigsaw puzzle ends up getting hit by sudden errands and intrusions. Only time I can get to it is late at night when I’m already drained. There’s no enjoyment there because I’m numb. This has been going on for years too. It got worse this year because the divorce has caused some people to intrude on my time out of ‘fear that I should not be alone’. There’s no privacy and a lot of pushiness.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Staci Troilo says:

        I’m sorry. I’ll continue praying for you.

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