Goal Post: Not Bad, But Still Came Up Short a Bit

I need to revaluate my writing ability and speed.  My goal was to write chapters 6 and 7 of Darwin & the Demon Game.  I missed the mark by one section, which is rather frustrating.  To be fair, I lost most of Saturday to a plumbing emergency in the morning and then a doctor appointment that went into the early afternoon.  By the time I finished lunch, it was nearly 3 PM.  So, I could only get one section chapter 6 done.  Managed to get 3 done on Sunday and was home sick on Tuesday to get another under my belt.  Pushed myself too far and that was it for me.  Maybe I’ll finish chapter 7 on Monday night and then I’ll be ready for next weekend . . . Won’t hold my breath.

The problem I keep running into is that I wear down mentally and physically fairly quickly.  I thought it was because of the sleeping issues, but I’m starting to wonder if something else is going on.  I mean, doing a full day of writing never used to phase me, but now it leaves me dragging the next day.  The weather might be a factor too.  Yet, none of this was going on prior to me catching Covid in the summer.  It’s possible that my brain is still foggy, which is combining with the anxiety-induced insomnia.  I mean, I can’t recall ideas as well as I used to.  Really need my notes these days.  It scares me that I simply can’t be an author any more.  Not like I’ve felt like one in years since nothing sells and nobody seems genuinely interested in my books.

Updating people on the anxiety and insomnia issues, I’ve gotten to the point where I can get 6-6.5 hours of sleep during a weeknight.  Keep in mind that I wake up at 5:30 AM on these days.  I also wake up around 3/4 AM, but now I’m getting the panic attacks under control within 5-10 minutes and then I’m out again.  Last Saturday, I went to a doctor to talk about it, but the answer I was given was medication.  Haven’t started it yet and I’m unsure if I should bother since I’m getting better.  Always been iffy on any medication that messes with my mind in any way.  Still on the fence about the whole thing and I might ask if it’s really necessary next time.  That would be next Saturday along with a separate eye exam, which is why I’m not holding my breath for writing time.

On the plus side of things, I got all of the April posts done and will start working on the May ones whenever I don’t have any time to write books.  I really need to touch the ‘Phi Beta Files’ notebook again too.  Kind of forgotten some of that information, so I need to study it again.  Not this Monday, but the following one will be something that has me stuck in a room for 4 hours.  I won’t be alone, but maybe I can do some notebook work.  Guess we’ll see since it depends a lot on the company I’ll be stuck with.

Another highlight to the week was a field trip to an aquarium.  Remember that I work with special needs students, so this was a big event.  Can’t go into details here, but all of them did amazing.  Everyone had fun.  Everyone behaved on the bus ride there and back.  Not a single thing went wrong and everyone left smiling.  It was definitely the best day of the week for me.  Just love seeing our kids showing how far they’ve come with all of their skills and behaviors.

What else went on?  My son had a bunch of tests, so we had to do a lot of studying.  I’m really glad that was this week because we’re going to see ‘Wicked’ on Broadway tomorrow.  I would hate for us to have to cram in a bunch of studying on a weekend where we have a special event.  Been planning this for a while since tickets to this autism-friendly showing don’t come up often.  Think it’s the first time we’ve seen them for ‘Wicked’ too.  Nice way to relax before a busy week leading into Winter Break.  Not sure what the weather is going to be like when we have off, so we need to enjoy events as they come.

A lot is going on this week, so I won’t get my hopes up for much to happen beyond work and parenting.  Tuesday and Thursday have appointments.  Monday and Wednesday might give me some writing opportunities.  The next two sections are talking ones, so that might make them more doable.  I still need to make sure I get enough sleep and give myself about an hour of quiet time before bed.  The ashwagandha gummies are starting to make a visible impact on my anxiety, which is good.  I still shouldn’t push myself until I get more under control.

So, what are the goals of the week?

  1. Make Penne with Vodka Sauce tonight.
  2. ‘Wicked’ tomorrow.
  3. Help son with schoolwork or just have fun if he doesn’t have much.
  4. Write more Darwin & the Demon Game.
  5. Start reading ‘Naruto’ again.  A student started the series and wants me to read it too.
  6. Continue working on Lego Bowser.
  7. Continue improving sleeping habits.
  8. Tinker with ‘Phi Beta Files’ if possible.
  9. Gather pictures for the May posts.  Maybe set up Teasers and Poems.

That’s something else I need to figure out.  What should I do about the teaser posts?  They don’t seem to garner any attention beyond people who have already read the books.  Is there anything else I could do on Tuesdays?  Maybe repost the character posts from many years back?

About Charles Yallowitz

Charles E. Yallowitz was born, raised, and educated in New York. Then he spent a few years in Florida, realized his fear of alligators, and moved back to the Empire State. When he isn't working hard on his epic fantasy stories, Charles can be found cooking or going on whatever adventure his son has planned for the day. 'Legends of Windemere' is his first series, but it certainly won't be his last.
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15 Responses to Goal Post: Not Bad, But Still Came Up Short a Bit

  1. Victoria Zigler says:

    Sorry you’ve been having such a rough time with health and anxiety issues. That seems to be a theme lately. I’m having a rough time of it myself, hence not being around much recently. Good luck with dealing with whatever it is that’s going on with you.

    Anyway, that’s great about your son’s progress and tests, and about how far the other kids have come; a field trip with no issues and al the kids still smiling come the end is a definite success!


  2. I don’t blog ahead. I just post what I feel, usually after a day of trying to work on something.


  3. I post about a week ahead, sometimes at the last minute with adding the links and all. But I try to keep it with current events happening in my life. A lot of mental problems are being tackled right now for sure. I just had my bipolar meeting with my psychiatrist. She also does my anxiety. The meds do stifle my creativity compared to how it used to flow but in another area, it’s given me control over the focus of my writing. That I wouldn’t trade. I know each of us has to take our own path. I hope you figure your own out soon. Hugs and good luck, Charles.


    • I post primarily about aspects of storytelling. The real life post is always a Saturday update. So, I go hunting for topics or work off something I saw/read. I don’t have any real focus issues with writing. It’s more endurance and confidence. I’m worried a bit about the medication numbing my emotions to the point where I simply don’t care any more.


  4. Jennie says:

    Sounds like a good week, especially the Aquarium. Don’t you think endurance and energy issues are much more common in the winter?


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