Final Fantasy 7 Highwind
Welcome to . . . what do you mean this is unprecedented? Look, I’m really busy here since airships are a new technology. Half of what we make even lasts a month before crashing, bursting into flames, or not working. In our defense, we have to outsource to other labs when deadlines get tight. Also in our defense, nobody has died because we take safety extremely seriously. Teleportation seats, protection bubbles, water spouts, and rescue breezes are all available. You have to pick at least one to finish the contract. So, how big do you want your airship?
I assume we’re talking a small family and not extended. That gives you two choices that aren’t our biggest sellers because most people want huge. Seriously, I sold an airship that can fit five hundred people to a nobleman that refuses to let anyone else on it. He crashed it into the ocean on the first flight because he lacked a crew. Now, the first one is a golem-powered pedal ship that has a control room, one common room, no kitchen, and scattered compartments for storage. The second is powered by flight crystals and you would control the ship through the sensory orb. That one has a kitchen and the driver’s spot is more like a closet because you don’t want other people to get in the way. Storage is more centralized too. I’m pushing that one more because you mentioned kids and the golems can be a little scary.
Great, so that’s the second and now we have to decide on color. No, we don’t do weaponry because of contracts and various laws. You can outfit it if you want, but you will sign a letter that says all alterations made after the sale are not our responsibility. This is a fairly new technology, so we don’t have a lot of additions. I guess I could explain more of the inside if you want. To make room for guests, golems, and the driver, we put all of the mechanical pieces in shielded shafts that run throughout the airship. This means you don’t have a central engineering room, which does have the downside of making issues more difficult to find. We can include a scan and repair system that is still in the experimental phase. That wouldn’t be extra since you can list yourself as a tester and merely report to us at the end of every week. No problems with it so far beyond one time it mistook the flight gems for foreign entities and ejected them from the ship. We’ve made sure that can’t happen again . . . in flight.
Now getting back to color. Yes, we do have a few camouflage systems, which will allow you to blend into the sky. I don’t recommend any of them though. Not what you would expect, but I’m a scientist before I’m a salesman. They work perfectly, but other flying things crash into them. We need to find a way to keep the airships hidden from sight, sound, and touch. Ever hear a griffin slam into a fortified window? Nowhere near as funny as you would think and they get really angry. Trust me when I say it isn’t worth the risk even for advancement.
Legends of Windemere 
A whole new visual on the bug on a windshield.
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Going to need a really big squeegee.
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Extra wiper blades at least.
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Industrial strength too. They might want to find a way to prevent those accidents.
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Cow catcher just doesn’t sound right on an airship.
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Griffin grabber?
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Dragon deflector? Pegasus protector?
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In-flight Meal Catcher?
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Great marketing, and for some species they even cook themselves, providing the baloon survives.
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True. Probably better for those that work off magic-powered engines and rotors. Then again, there could be force fields to protect the balloon.
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I could use one of these to strafe the Winter Texans. LOL
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Winter Texans? That anything like the Florida Snowbirds? I’d recommend non-lethal ordinance though. Don’t want get yourself in too much trouble.
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How about vomit bombs
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Gross, but effective.
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Yeah, I’m thinking safe but will get the job done.
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I need a fleet of airships, can you supply them? I’m not too picky on what they look like, all they need to do is fly, oh yeah, I also need them to be steam powered. If you can throw some cogs and gears and clockwork stuff everywhere that would be great.
Oh, you don’t happen to have a model with a time travel option, do you?
Do you happen to know where I can buy some aviator scarfs, top hats and goggles? Preferably somewhere close by?
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Time travel isn’t an option since that can lead to trouble. Last we want is to send someone back who tries to start our business before us. That and rewriting history. We do have a clothing section near the front since we get these requests a lot. The young woman in charge can order things that we’re out of too.
Now the cogs and gears and stuff is doable. Our steam tech isn’t on par with our magic tech. So we can do a combo to make sure you don’t crash. Now, would you like them in the shape of gears so they can combine for some big ship or attack?
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That would be great, gear shaped air ships!
I don’t want to travel to the past, I’m looking for a one way trip into the future, say a million years or so.
I’ll take some time and talk to the young woman about cloths, thanks.
How long does it take to build such a fleet?
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Sadly, time travel has to go both ways in case one needs to return. Those are our world’s rules. Besides, if a person goes forward and never comes back then we don’t know if it worked. The lawsuits from loved ones would be impossible to defend against. It’s simply safer for us to not take the risk. This does mean you can find someone to add such magic or tech later, but that does void all warranties except glass coverage.
Time would be one month if I put the entire force on it. This is if you want a fifty ship fleet. One week will give you ten. This is because we take safety seriously and always test the prototype before mass production. Once your design is in the system, you can always get more later at a faster, discounted rate too.
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Okay, you have a sale, I’ll take a fleet of fifty… say, can you add in some kind of quick escape method so my soldiers can get out quickly and safely? Preferably with their armor and weapons.
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Every chair will double as an escape pod, but one needs to sit on it. Armor might be an issue depending on size. Platemail is pretty bulky.
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Chain mail is my favorite, it’s the best, my soldiers agree, if they don’t agree, they find another job… if they can.
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Then it shouldn’t be a problem of weight and size. Though, I will suggest checking all suits for loose rings. Last thing you want is for someone to get caught on a switch. This is why we make the self-destructive buttons bigger and attach a neon ‘not a coaster!’ sign to the console.
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What do these use for fuel? Lots of running squirrels? 😀
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Most of our vehicles run off magic, golem power, or wind. Some do operate with steam, but that’s a fairly new technology that isn’t reliable. We did attempt squirrels, which went horribly. You don’t want to restrain them to the point of injury, but too much leeway and they run off the wheels. That’s if they run anyway. Golems are easier to use.
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