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Welcome. Do you want a table or a booth?  Just follow me and I’ll get you set up with water and a bread basket.  Here are some menus with explanations of what each of our meals can do.  If you want, this is a list of our popular items since the real menu is the size of a windshield and has five pages.  I’ll be back in 5 minutes to see if you need more time, but feel free to rudely wave me off for doing my job.  Enjoy.

Breakfast

• Pancakes–  Grants power of levitation, but skin changes color depending on the combination of spread (syrup, butter, jelly, etc.) and type (chocolate, blueberry, birthday, etc.)
• Waffles–  Grants power to enlarge hands in order to hold anything.  Fingers become sticky, so it is difficult to drop things.
• French Toast–  Ability to emit a spray of powdered sugar from your mouth.  Can happen while speaking.
• Crepes– Grants power to turn anything into a warm blanket.  Be careful around loved ones.
• Bagels–  No powers.  You’re obviously too busy for shenanigans.
• Omelet– Grants ability to make yourself look younger for an hour at a time.  You will easily get sunburned and cooked in direct sunlight.

Appetizers

• Mozzarella Sticks– Gain stretching powers, but the limb or whatever is being extended will be flabby.  Difficult to retract.
• Potato Skins– Split yourself into two semi-identical parts.  The newly sprouted side will have some movement issues.
• Calamari–  Grow tentacles.  Not allowed to go to anime conventions, anime stores, or Japan while power activated.  (If you don’t know why then it’s better that way.)
• Chicken Fingers–  Grow chicken fingers.  Not the fingers of chickens, but fingers that are small chickens with beaks.
• Mac & Cheese– Grants a melted cheese form similar to a slime monster.  Not sanitary.

Lunch

• Burgers–  Gain the strength of the ‘animal’ the burger was made from.  Our choices are turkey, chicken, cow, bison, and veggie.  Downside is self-explanatory.
• Reuben– Gives the power of x-ray vision.  You smell and taste delicious to the point carnivores will try to take a bite.
• One of Sandwiches Named after a Celebrity–  Grants ability to transform into that celebrity.  Oh, you will definitely get sued if you use this power for evil.
• Grilled Cheese– Can swing arms to slash any material in half.  You will forever believe that diagonal cuts mean bigger pieces than vertical/horizontal.
• Chicken Wrap–  Enhanced sense of taste.  You will know exactly what is floating in the air around you.
• Cubano Panini– Grants ability to emit sonic blasts from mouth.  They’re burps.
• Gyros–  Grants ability to fold anything perfectly.  Recommended for those who have to fold fitted sheets.  No downside.

Dinner

• Meatloaf– Grants the ability to create category one hurricanes with a clap.  We have no idea why and can’t get the power to change.  Maybe it’s the mashed potatoes.
• Seafood– Ability to summon a vehicle that allows you pass easily through traffic.  It’s an ambulance.  Seriously, order the seafood at your own risk.
• Lobster–  Separate because we have them in a tank.  Grants ability to turn into a lobster . . . Yeah, that would worry me too.
• Chicken Parmigiana– Can understand every spoken and written language.  Cannot stop yourself from arguing pronunciations and spellings of words.
• Penne ala Vodka–  Grants immunity from getting drunk.  Does not stop your bladder and stomach from going into overdrive after drinking too much.
• Steak–  Grants the ability to use fire magic.  Power of flames depends entirely on how cooked your steak was.  Most people don’t get a lot of out this one.