Nightmare Before Christmas Doors

Labor Day- My time has come!

Memorial Day- Congrats, but what are you about?

Labor Day- I . . . I don’t know any more.

Halloween- She’s the sign that summer is ending, school is starting, and some people can get off from work.

Labor Day- That can’t be it. Can it?

Halloween- At least you get the day off. I have actual traditions that can’t be done until kids get back from school and most people hide in their houses anyway.

Easter- That’s because you’re Satanic.

Halloween- I’m Christian, you candy-theme stealing jerk! At least I make sense. Death of a savior equals chocolate, bunnies, eggs, and ham? No wonder Jews can’t figure you out.

Passover- Leave us out of this. We have enough trouble explaining ourselves.

Yom Kippur- Sooooo hungry.

Labor Day- Can we get back to me? It’s my day! Forget the rest of you! My day!

Veteran’s Day- You were originally an idea stolen from Toronto’s labour festival and . . . I think you’re just a celebration of the strength of the working man. You’ve been turned into a retail holiday like many of us.

Black Friday- One of us! One of us!

Labor Day- Who invited him?

Thanksgiving- Sorry. He’s my vestigial twin, so he goes where I go. He gets more crazed and warped every year.

Ground starts shaking as something massive approaches. A towering figure of red, white, and black looms over the crowd of holidays.

Christmas- I’ll tell you what all of you are!

Independence Day- Not this shit again.

Christmas- All of you are my bitches! Even you , Easter and Passover.

Easter- I did notice a few chocolate Santas being sold this year.

Passover- Uh, we gave you Chanukah as a sacrifice and you’ve left the rest of us alone. Most people don’t even know about us, so I’m not your bitch. Right, guys?

Yom Kippur- Sooooo hungry.

Labor Day- Has everyone forgotten about me? Hello? This is my day! Why is nobody paying attention to me any more? What is the point of my existence?

Black Friday- One of us! One of us! One of us!

Labor Day- I hate all of you.