The Curious Coffee Cafe

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Welcome to our little coffee shop.  Now, I just opened up and have no idea what I’m doing, especially since I drink tea.  All I know is that a voice told me to open this place and a bunch of coffee trees grew in my backyard.  We can make regular coffee, lattes, espresso, and everything else on that list.  Take a look at the bean list and let me know what you would like.  Feel free to tell me what I’m doing too.

  • Arabica– standard coffee that helps you stay awake.  Grants ability to summon horses until digestion is complete.
  • Robusta– Grants heightened endurance and durability, except in the gastrointestinal arena.
  • Liberica– Grants the ability to shapeshift, but you cannot grow more than a foot larger than your natural height.  NO GODZILLA FORM!
  • Blue Mountain– Turn skin into stone-like armor, but creates mild sadness when in this form.
  • Bourbon–  No powers . . . In fact, I don’t even think this is coffee.  Yeah . . . It’s just booze.
  • Starmaya– Grants the ability to fly up, but you have to let yourself float back down as the coffee goes through your system.
  • Timor– Drinker can turn invisible, but they will lose their sense of sight until they become visible again.
  • Kona– Grants drinker the ability to control the weather.  You will be hated by all meteorologists and sunbathers.
  • Bonifieur– Enhances the strengths of the drinker.  No promises on it being clear what abilities have been enhanced since you might not be aware of your strengths.
  • Geisha– *no longer avoid due to protests*
  • Sidamo– Stretchy fingers that can be controlled regardless of length.
  • Maragogipe– Drinker doubles in size, so best to enjoy outside and while wearing spandex.
  • Pache Colis– Grants ability to sprout ripe fruit from shoulders.  Fruit must be chosen prior to first sip or it will always be durian.

About Charles Yallowitz

Charles E. Yallowitz was born, raised, and educated in New York. Then he spent a few years in Florida, realized his fear of alligators, and moved back to the Empire State. When he isn't working hard on his epic fantasy stories, Charles can be found cooking or going on whatever adventure his son has planned for the day. 'Legends of Windemere' is his first series, but it certainly won't be his last.
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13 Responses to The Curious Coffee Cafe

  1. noelleg44 says:

    What fun, Charles. I’d be a regular at the cafe, drinking arabica (definitely) and starmaya (I’ve always wanted to fly). Frankly, if you could get everyone to drink kina, maybe we could solve the drought situation in the western US!


  2. Hilarious Charles. Maragogipe was a favorite.


  3. L. Marie says:

    Like John said, this is hilarious! 😅😅😅Though I was hoping for a Godzilla form. I guess you shouldn’t drink timor and drive.


  4. I am intrigued by the Bonifieur and would try it just to discover what strengths the coffee thinks I have.


  5. V.M.Sang says:

    I would definitely like Arabica. As a person who plays the piano (badly), and who sometimes has trouble reaching chords over an octave (yes, there are some). I could quite fancy a cup of Sidamo. A few composers must have had huge hands, and thought no one else would want to play their music.


  6. Make something that allows me to retire financially, hold the fame. Maybe I should stick with the bourbon. Why are there so many durian piled in the corner?


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