Teaser Tuesday: Lord Adam of Crego #fantasy #vampires

War of Nytefall

How can I do a month of War of Nytefall: Anarchy teasers without including one with Clyde and Mab?  This one was really fun to write solely because a typo resulted in a running gag with Lord Adam of Crego.  Enjoy.

“Lord Adam of Crego and his loyal paladins have rid your lands of a foul band of blood-hungry creatures!” the man declares in a booming voice. Putting his weapon away, he is about to lift the visor of his helmet, but stops as if noticing the Dawn Fangs for the first time. “You two do not appear to be locals. That is very suspicious. I see no reason why you should hide such a lovely lady from holy warriors such as us. That is also very suspicious. Tell me what your business in Fylric is!”

“I believe this town is called Fyric,” Clyde calmly replies with a small bow. He does not react as the man draws his spear once more and aims the tip at his chest. “We’re newlyweds who have decided to travel the lesser-known towns of Ralian. This was to be our next stop, but I fear that it’s too loud and dangerous. After all, did you see the size of that giant who came by a little while ago? Now, you tell me that there are vampires around? Sorry, but I’m not the type of man who wishes to be around such creatures. I prefer my life to be quiet and uneventful since I despise violence.”

“Lay it on any thicker and you’ll suffocate everyone in town,” Mab mutters from behind his back.

“Did she say something?” Lord Adam asks as he leans forward. He smiles when the burglar peeks out from behind her partner and darts back out of sight. “I see your wife is shy. Not surprising considering the presence that I give off. Women find me irresistible, but my true love is the purging of evil from our fragile world. Now, you mentioned a giant. I did not see any tracks and all of the trees are upright. We have been in the area for hours and did not see any such creature. Are you sure it wasn’t an illusion created by one of these bandits? They may have wanted to clear the town for a night raid.”

“Guess he’s not an idiot,” Clyde whispers under his breath. He waits for the warrior to respond as he did before, but the man merely cocks his head to the side. “It could have been them, but I wouldn’t know about such things. Honestly, it feels like another reason for us to find a quieter place to enjoy our first journey as husband and wife. Isn’t that right, dear? You don’t want to get caught up in any trouble either.”

“No . . . It could ruin my hair and cla . . . nails!” the burglar shouts without stepping into the open.

Leaping off his stallion, the paladin closes the gap between him and the Dawn Fangs with three long strides. “If I am not mistaken, you came from the same direction as we did. I smell nature on you and see dirt on your shoulders, which means you were in the forest. How did you not run into these bandits? We found them slumbering in the trees only half a mile from here. It is possible were taking a nap and never noticed your presence, but one of them was dangling by his legs. Perhaps you did not wander into that specific area, but it is strange they were found in a peculiar situation and you are here. There is something very strange about you. I cannot figure out why I find you unnerving.”

“I can say the same about you,” the raven-haired Dawn Fang counters. He leans back when the larger man tries to loom over him and cringes at the pain in his shoulders. “Well, you claim to be a paladin. That would be apparent from the company you keep, but I see no emblem on your chest like the others. How do I know you’re really what you say you are? You could be one of the bandits who has used magic to control these weak-willed holy warriors. It wouldn’t be the first time.”

“It would not be,” Lord Adam agrees as he moves back. His head lowers enough that the Dawn Fangs can tell that something has caught his eye. “That is an interesting necklace you have there. Looks like an ear of corn. Your wife is wearing a beautiful jacket too. May I assume it is made from hydra scales? I have faced enough of those beasts to recognize the pattern. I believe this is a glorious day, my friends! We have the leaders of the rumored kingdom of Nytefall in our path. The monstrous Clyde and his beloved Dark Mistress must have just given orders to their bandits. Good thing we happened by or who knows what destruction would have ensued. Fylric is too beautiful a town to be-”

“It’s called Fyric!”

“A creature of darkness has no right to-”

“I’m standing in sunlight.”

“Be that as it may-”

“Do I really look like a creature?”

“Many beasts take human-”

“Then, you could be one too, right?”

“Please stop spouting such-”

“Only because you asked nicely.”

Clyde’s foot strikes Lord Adam in the chest with enough force to send him flying towards the other paladins. They scramble to get their horses out of the way of the heavily armored man, who lifts his spear over his head. The Dawn Fangs are already on the run by the time the man plunges his weapon into the earth and uses it to stop his momentum. To give themselves a better head start, Clyde has the giant reappear on the edge of Fyric. The monster leans over the entire town and roars loud enough to drive all of the halflings into a panicky mob. Not wanting to trample the short townsfolk, the paladins are forced to dismount and carefully push their way through the crowd.

“Do not worry, men, because they will not get as far as they think,” Lord Adam assures the others with a hearty laugh. With a snap of his fingers, a glistening dome billows out of the symbol of Neberith and covers Fyric in a shield. “Let us enjoy this hunt for it may be the one that wins us our crusade. May the scriptures of our deeds claim that the leaders of the vampire scourge were slain in the town of Fylric. To bat-”

“It’s Fyric, you moron!” a female voice screams from down the road.

“To battle,” the paladin grumbles under his breath.

About Charles Yallowitz

Charles E. Yallowitz was born, raised, and educated in New York. Then he spent a few years in Florida, realized his fear of alligators, and moved back to the Empire State. When he isn't working hard on his epic fantasy stories, Charles can be found cooking or going on whatever adventure his son has planned for the day. 'Legends of Windemere' is his first series, but it certainly won't be his last.
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7 Responses to Teaser Tuesday: Lord Adam of Crego #fantasy #vampires

  1. A fun one, Charles. The running gag was terrific.


  2. L. Marie says:

    I agree with John. Great humor!


  3. This one really works for me. I’m a firm believer in a little humor in stories. Well done.


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