7 Ways to Enjoy the Outside While Working Inside

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  1. Claim it’s ‘Send Your Child to Work’ Day.  Similar to ‘Take Your Child to Work’ Day, but you don’t show up.  This may require a little set up, so make sure the check the weather at least 3 days in advanced.  Takes a while to change all the calendars and forge an official office email.
  2. Repeatedly scratch at the walls of your cubicle.  Add some whimpers and make sure speakerphone is on, so your boss can hear that you want to go outside.  After all, they keep you sectioned off like a dog in a kennel, so you might as well act like one.  Just know where to draw the line.
  3. Keep losing your office supplies, which requires that you go down a few floors to inventory.  Just so happens that Joe down there needs to go to Staples to pick up what you need.  Even worse, both of your cars won’t start and now you have to walk the five blocks.  The things you do for post-its and paper clips.
  4. Put your chair outside with a small table for your wireless mouse and keyboard.  Move your desk against the wall, so that the computer is facing outside where you are.  Now you do work and enjoy the outdoors.  (Note:  This method is ONLY for people who work on the first floor of a building.)
  5. Paint all of the office windows black and lock the front doors.  Then swallow all of the keys.  If you can’t be outside then you don’t want to know it’s there.  Everyone else will have to take one for the team. By team, you mean you and the cackling voices inside your head.
  6. Demand a lunchtime game of Hide & Seek.  Drive home when nobody is watching and come back the next morning in the same clothes.  Ask why people stopped looking and point out that you were hiding all night.  Break down in tears and ramble about the wild animal that forced you to climb a tree for safety.  Now you have an extra day to enjoy the weather.
  7. Call in sick.  Seriously, do it and hang out in your backyard.  Don’t go anywhere that you can run into someone from work.  If need be, practice your fake coughs the night before.

About Charles Yallowitz

Charles E. Yallowitz was born, raised, and educated in New York. Then he spent a few years in Florida, realized his fear of alligators, and moved back to the Empire State. When he isn't working hard on his epic fantasy stories, Charles can be found cooking or going on whatever adventure his son has planned for the day. 'Legends of Windemere' is his first series, but it certainly won't be his last.
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17 Responses to 7 Ways to Enjoy the Outside While Working Inside

  1. Olivia Stocum says:

    Haha. This is great!

    Like

  2. Interesting, you and John used the same graphic today. What are the odds of that happening? Better go buy a lottery ticket.

    Like

  3. Pingback: Lmao I needed this today haha – Dreams within me.

  4. I wish I could work full time so I could do these things. LOL.

    Like

  5. I’m so trying #6 😀

    Like

  6. Bookwraiths says:

    Your Child to Work and Close Your Office Door So No One Can See You Two Playing Video Games on Your Computer.” It really does work if you set up how you’re closing the door to keep your kid from disturbing everyone else. 🙂

    Like

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