Cover Art by Jason Pedersen
Collage by Chris the Storyreading Ape
Sounds like you need to get away from wherever you live. Well, you’ve come to the right place to escape the Shattered States. Whatever that is. I don’t get out much, kid, so the world outside could be ruled by a sentient pencil eraser and I wouldn’t notice. As long as I can get my home decor magazines, I’m rather oblivious. Fine, I was just having a conversation before we got down to business. Guess I can mark off any tours that require being social. Now, I do have the Windemere package.
Oh, it’s a rather exciting place and I promise that you won’t get bored. There’s magic, monsters, adventures, and all the things you loved from fantasy books. Also the stuff you hated, but I assure you that healers are cheap there. We can put a temple voucher pack into your purchase too, which comes with a list of gods and goddesses that are more on the healing side of life than the destructive. Trust me when I say Skragor the God of Disasters isn’t the one you want to see about a broken leg. Not unless you want to get his followers to laugh.
Now we can start you in various locations. There’s Rodillen the city of thieves, which means we will start you with no converted money. You’ll end up getting robbed quickly, so it’s best to have nothing on you and play stupid. Do a job or two for the guild and sneak onto a shop to continue on your way. We’ll give you a week of training to help you with that. We also have Gaia, which is the biggest city on the continent and our easiest starting point. There’s an elf who will act as your guide until you feel comfortable enough to leave the city. Canst’s Fields is more for ruin hunters and nobody has seen it show up in the books yet. Ambervale is only if you’re a god. Cerascent is an archipelago with two tour types. One is a simple cruise among the islands and the other is a worker cruise among the islands. The difference is number one is a pirate ship and number two has you rowing while chained to a wall.
Oh, that pamphlet I’m using to level the table? Not sure why we have that option, but it goes to a place called Shayd. Constant storms, desolate landscape, undead, a species called chaos elves, and rumor has it that one of the most evil beings is trapped there. I . . . Well if that sounds more fun that these Shattered States then who am I to judge. I’ll just need you to sign these waivers, take these forms to a doctor, get the proper shots, notify your next of kin, meet with the company psychologist, give us a list of allergies, look to your left, cough, and pack your own bags. Why is my hair turning green and my skin changing color? Probably someone I ate.
Yola Biggs by Kayla Matt
Legends of Windemere 
This was cool. Very creative promotional piece.
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Thanks. It was a fun little skit. 🙂
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Charles, compelling promotional post! The tour is enticing! I’m in line, papers in hand! Happy weekend! 💛 Elizabeth
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Enjoy the trip. Though I’d be careful of where you go. Something about the travel agent is a little off.
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Never trust a travel agent named Charles. You will end up tied to a tree with no underthings.
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Unless you start with no underthings. Then you’ll end up tied to a bush with three pairs of underwear on.
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Okay no mention of the price for a ticket.
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It’s all negotiable.
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I kinda thought so.
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Reblogged this on POTL: All Things Books, Reading and Publishing and commented:
I’m booking a trip right now. Who’s with me? 😉
MRS N
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Where do I sign up? Brilliant and very creative, Charles! 😉
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Thanks for the reblog.
Just come on down to the office and sign on the dotted line. Though you’ll have to move quickly. The line has a habit of trying to make a break for it.
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Reblogged this on A Good Blog is Hard to Find and commented:
Check out Charles Yallowitz’s blog and his series Legends of Windemere! -OM
Note: Comments disabled here. Please visit their blog.
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Thanks for the reblog. Really appreciate it.
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No worries man. I wish you the best with the series!
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Thanks. It’s still chugging along.
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Reblogged this on Nicholas C. Rossis and commented:
Sounds like fun, right?
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It’ll be a blast. 😀
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Reblogged this on firefly465.
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Thanks for the reblog.
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A trip that sounds familiar one that I see in my head if I have a sip of coffee before bed if I fillow it with cheese I visulise a disease. Great fun, thank you. X
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You’re welcome. Glad you enjoyed it.
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