The Magical Ornament Store: No Cats Allowed

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Welcome to our little ornament store.  Each of our products has a little enchantment to enhance your holiday season.  At least, that’s what we hope.  Here is a list of our most popular ornaments.  Don’t mind the names.  We’re Jewish, so we just call them like we see them.

  • Red Ball–  Gives off a nice aura of warmth.  Does not require electricity, but can be hot to the touch.
  • Green Ball–  Emits a soothing pine scent.  We assume it’s soothing since you keep that kind of tree in your house.
  • White and Red Striped Ball– Emits a peppermint scent.  We don’t recommend mixing it with the green ball.
  • Silver Ball– Polishes silverware that it is put in contact with.
  • Silver Bell– Can summon a sugar plum fairy . . . We don’t really know what that is, but people seem to like them.
  • Snowflake–  Can create a thin layer of snow on the tree and surrounding area.  Perfect for having indoor snowball fights.
  • Rocking Horse–  Can be taken off and turned into a full-sized rocking horse once per day.  Effect lasts for an hour.  Needs 24 hours to recharge.
  • Small Christmas Tree–  Keeps real tree hydrated and fresh.  Small chance of it growing in height.
  • Angel Topper–  Spins and emits a soothing light.  Will occasionally pass heavenly judgment and punishment on guests.
  • Snowman– Comes to life at night to clean up the house.  Will become inanimate if seen and undo its work before returning to the tree.
  • Santa Claus– Transforms into a present on Christmas Day.  No way to predict what it is or who it is for.
  • Harp–  Plays Christmas music when hung from tree.  Cannot be turned off without being removed.
  • Reindeer– Grants the ability to fly.  This ability goes to the tree, which doesn’t have the mind to do so.  At least, you would hope not.
  • Stocking– Can be turned upside down on Christmas morning to release a collection of tiny treats.  Not recommended for anyone with food allergies because nuts are a possibility.
  • Sleigh/Sled– Can be enlarged and used, but must stay attached to the tree.
  • Polar Bear– Protects the house from the inevitable polar bear uprising.  Can also be used to conjure fish and seal meat.
  • Penguin–  No powers, but it’s an adorable penguin.  Why wouldn’t you want one?
  • Christmas Freddy Krueger– Give to your enemies and plague them with horrific nightmares.  (For some reason, this is our second most popular ornament.  The first is the penguin.)

About Charles Yallowitz

Charles E. Yallowitz was born, raised, and educated in New York. Then he spent a few years in Florida, realized his fear of alligators, and moved back to the Empire State. When he isn't working hard on his epic fantasy stories, Charles can be found cooking or going on whatever adventure his son has planned for the day. 'Legends of Windemere' is his first series, but it certainly won't be his last.
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17 Responses to The Magical Ornament Store: No Cats Allowed

  1. L. Marie says:

    Is it possible to get a full set of these?
    Now I have “The Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy” going through my head. Happens a lot at this time of year.
    Have to laugh at the “no cats allowed.” A friend’s two cats live underneath her Christmas tree. Constantly knock ornaments off or break them.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. The red and silver ones sound really handy!


  3. A great selection, Charles. Like L Marie, I would like a whole set. By the way. no mention of price. How much is a whole set?


  4. I hope the internet is correct in this Charles – chag Hanukkah sameach.


  5. V.M.Sang says:

    I would like a Christmas Snowman. Doing all the chores sounds a brilliant idea.


  6. I need that polar bear. Seal meat for everyone. Yay!


  7. noelleg44 says:

    I’d really like a silver ball – I have a lot of silver that needs polishing!


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