2018 Ends with a Crumble

I don’t think I can pick a song that can work with all this.  (I’ll grab one anyway.)  Honestly, I don’t even know how to write this post.  The job is going fine and I haven’t done any writing.  Those aren’t the big things though.  I mean, they would have been, except something happened.  Something life-changing happened.  It will take months to sort out and I think I’ve already gone through the 5 stages of grief a few times in the last 48 hours.  I expect at least one more round of it before the end of the weekend.  Heck, I’m tearing up while writing this and just rambling.  So, what happened?

Unfortunately, I can’t say.  A few people who talk to me in private know.  That’s where it will stay for a while because I can’t bring this out into the light right now.  It is a major change and alteration to my life that I need to both focus on and distract myself from.  If you do think you know what happened then please don’t start suggesting it in the comments.  I don’t normally delete them, but I will here.  All I can really say is that things are going to change:

  1. I’m going to be a little more ‘liker’ than ‘commenter’ on other blogs.  Being social online is going to be tough because my usual wit is dulled.
  2. I will be able to get back into writing earlier than expected.  Not sure what this means for publishing, but editing will be doable.  At least once I get my head together.
  3. There might be a few dark moments from me.  There might also be a few moments where I don’t seem to be making much sense.  Bare (bear?) with me.
  4. I . . . . I . . . Fuck it.

Look, I’m really making this post and the one tomorrow to keep my 900+.  Also, I figure not doing a goal post for the first time in 5 years might make people suspicious.  This might just be making things worse, especially since I keep having the temptation to flirt the edge of blabbing.  I have a strong desire for comfort because I feel so cold, but it’s a chill that hasn’t gone away in 2 days.  Maybe I should turn tomorrow’s post into a poem?  Nah, too risky.

I’m going to end on a picture of something new that I might be getting.  A desk:


Looks like a good one that I will enjoy putting together and using if I can get it.

Goals of the week?

  1. Continue on.

About Charles Yallowitz

Charles E. Yallowitz was born, raised, and educated in New York. Then he spent a few years in Florida, realized his fear of alligators, and moved back to the Empire State. When he isn't working hard on his epic fantasy stories, Charles can be found cooking or going on whatever adventure his son has planned for the day. 'Legends of Windemere' is his first series, but it certainly won't be his last.
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21 Responses to 2018 Ends with a Crumble

  1. Well, I’m glad things are fine with the new job at least. That’s nice.

    Just trying to focus on the positive…


  2. Love the desk. Putting it together might be a new goal of the week. I hope next week is better.


  3. Sue Vincent says:

    Whatever is going on, Charles… and if it doesn’t sound too forward… hugs.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Darlene says:

    Hang in there and know you have the support of your blogging community. xo


  5. Going out of your way to not have a goal, is kind of a goal in itself. You might want a week like that. Hope you get the desk.


  6. HL Carpenter says:

    Change … happens, then becomes the new norm. Persevere.


  7. cagedunn says:

    *hugs* be well.


  8. Hang in there Charles. Please let me know if I can help in any way.


  9. Oh no, something ELSE? Charles, I’m so sorry. Deep breaths, one day at a time, all that psycho-pop stuff. I sure hope things will get better for you and your family.


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