(In honor of people who give dietary advice without being asked for it. 😉  Yeah, I set out to anger people with this one.)

Put that food down!

You are lucky I was here

To stop you from yourself

Pushing fat into your arteries

And cholesterol into your blood

Killing yourself with sugars

But I am here to save you

No need to thank me

What do you mean?

You are not thankful

That I have come to help

I do not care

If you like that food

Or that your taste buds scream

In heavenly orgasm

At its very scent

I see science will not work

You are in too deep

Let us find another snack

No matter how you whine

Have some apples

Organically grown

To shiny, red perfection

Though cost more than your house

You still refuse

Because the price is high

And it will always be

For stores have us by the balls

When it comes to eating true

But that is not the point

Forget the fortune that you spend

Is your health not worth it?

Think about your spouse

And your children sitting home

Be healthy for their sake

How will you feel

If you selfishly drop dead?

Leaving them alone

Mourning for a gluttonous fool

That abandoned them for a snack

I believe I hit a nerve

Just as you have hit my face

Swearing I went too far

In pushing your good health

My preaching is now done

And left my stomach empty

So I have a final question

Where can I buy that food?