You’re Not the Hero?

Batman Villains

Villain 1– We meet at least, great hero.  Now you will . . . Why are you wearing all black like me?

Villain 2– You can’t trick me, hero.  Pretending to be like me and . . . Are you riding a skeletal horse?

V1– I summoned it from the deepest depths of Hell.

V2–  That’s where I got my demonic eagle mount from.  Strange.

V1– What did you do to gain your great power of light?

V2– I use necromancy and I traded the souls of 100 orphaned puppies to get it.  Is your castle built on an active acid volcano?  I smell burning flesh too.

V1– Leave my lunch out of this.  Why do you have a priestess’s shrunken head hanging from your belt?

V2– Follow your own advice.  So . . . Are we both villains?

V1– It seems so.  Makes me wonder why I bothered threatening your family.

V2– Thanks for forcing me to get rid of that weakness.  You still angry about me killing your children last month?

V1– They were planning on betraying me anyway.  I used their souls to gain immortality.

V2– I sacrificed an entire species to get mine.  Probably a survivor out there planning to kill me one day.

V1– Oh, I’m sure I have a bastard child out there destined to do the same.  Honestly, I thought that was you.

V2– Why would you think that?

V1– It was when you slaughtered one of my bases and made an altar out of my soldiers’ skulls.  Reminded me of my younger days.

V2– Wanted to go classic with that attack since it was an old fort.  It was sitting on a dragon egg nest that I wanted.

V1– I don’t see an army of dragons.

V2– I had them fight until only the strongest was left alive and now it guards my castle.

V1– Better idea than me using them for an omelet party.

V2– I roc eggs.  Are we friends or enemies now?

V1– Allies until one of us betrays the other.

V2– Well, I don’t know of any heroes we can unite against.  Seems like a pointless alliance until one shows up.

V1– Good point. Split the land and stay out of each other’s way until we’re forced into a conflict?

V2– Sure, but I’m going to push on your borders and jump at any opportunity to gain an advantage.

V1– I’d expect no less.

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About Charles Yallowitz

Charles E. Yallowitz was born, raised, and educated in New York. Then he spent a few years in Florida, realized his fear of alligators, and moved back to the Empire State. When he isn't working hard on his epic fantasy stories, Charles can be found cooking or going on whatever adventure his son has planned for the day. 'Legends of Windemere' is his first series, but it certainly won't be his last.
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9 Responses to You’re Not the Hero?

  1. L. Marie's avatar L. Marie says:

    I remember that image. It was from “Almost Got ’Im” in the Batman Animated series. A really good one for your theme this week. And yes, I can imagine two characters having a humorous conversation like this. They certain did in the Batman episode.

    Like

  2. V.M.Sang's avatar V.M.Sang says:

    It could almost be two well-known leaders today.

    Like

  3. Was it Alexander who wept because there were no more lands to conquer?

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