Welcome to this week’s edition of Lisa Burton Radio. I’m your host, Lisa the robot girl, and this week we’re trying to fix a relationship. Our special guest today is Steve. “Welcome to the show, Steve.”

“Thanks, Lisa, great to be here. So refreshing to talk to someone rational for a change. I’m going round in circles with Liesel.”

“Let’s hope we can help you fix that. Why don’t you tell us about how you guys met?”

“I was sitting at a table on my own in the staff canteen when I looked up from a plate of bright-orange chicken madras, to see this woman with lavish Pre-Raphaelite hair beaming down at me. She’d mistaken me for some other guy, but it didn’t matter once we got chatting. I found out later she’d made him up, this other guy. You’ve got to admire a woman who can pull off a…