Derailing Bedlam: Land of Stewed ‘Shrooms Part 4 #fiction #adventure

As usual, here is your warning that this story has cursing, sex (not graphic), innuendo, and violence.  It’s my Rated-R action adventure called Derailing Bedlam.  This is the fourth outing (third official) for Cassidy and Lloyd, so feel free to click on one of the two covers to see how it started.  Each one is 99 cents!

Cover by Jon Hunsinger

Cover Art by Jon Hunsinger











“I’m going to fuck you the fuck up!” Barrow screams over the intercom attached to his yellow sports car. Veering across the highway, he tries to get in front of the jeep, but is cut off again. “Nobody screws with my mom! I’m going to skull-fuck the both of you until my wrists get tired!”

“This brat is exactly the reason I hated online multiplayer games,” Cassidy says as they get close to a blockade. Barreling through the wooden gate, she sighs at the sight of an injured man clinging to the grill. “I’m rather torn here. Barrow is determined to kill us, but he’s just a foul-mouthed brat. Doesn’t feel right shooting anything lethal at him. Have any paintballs that can scare him off?”

“I will rape your corpse for what you did!” the teenager shrieks while running over some of his own people.

“Honestly, I’m having trouble thinking of him as a kid,” Lloyd admits before leaning out the window. He fires several stink bomb paintballs that splatter on the sports car’s windshield, but the stench has no effect. “I don’t think he’s going to back down. We put his mom into a coma and made his old man cry. Can’t say I blame him for being angry, but the constant swearing and threats are hard to shrug off. Do you think we can outlast him? I doubt he’d go beyond the family territory. Friends coming from the right!”

Cassidy is about to slow down to let the group of motorcycles get in front of them, but she sees that the sports car is getting closer. Rolling down the window on Lloyd’s side, she whistles to get him to lean back and cover his ears. She fires her pistol to take out three of the bikers, who fall into Barrow’s path. The others spread out to avoid suffering the same fate, one of them passing in front of the jeep. With a grunt, the injured man on the grill jumps to throw the rider off and take the motorcycle for himself. Struggling to retain his balance, he turns around and holds a grenade over his head as he heads straight for Cassidy’s door. The mercenary slams on the brakes and puts the jeep in reverse to move away from the incoming suicide bomber. Hitting the front of the sports car, she pushes the gas pedal to the floor while the motorcycle misses and crashes into the trees with a booming explosion. As a towering pine falls towards the road, Cassidy revs the engine and bursts forward to get by the obstacle. To her dismay, Barrow narrowly passes under the tree along with the rest of the motorcyclists.

Seeing an opening in the woods, Cassidy takes the jeep off-road in the hopes of losing the sports car. She is not surprised to hear the teenager scream obscenities and vulgar threats as he rushes down the highway with the intention of cutting them off. With only the motorcycles to worry about, the mercenary relaxes and waits for an opportunity to hit one of them. A vicious sideswipe sends a startled woman into a tree stump, the impact sending her flipping off the bike and slamming her neck-first into a tree. The remaining enemies stay back and shoot at the jeep, their shots directed at the bulletproof windows and tires. With all of them keeping their distance, Cassidy slows down to let the motorcycles catch up. She curses under her breath when they match her speed, none of them watching to get too close.

“Go to the right!” Lloyd shouts when he sees that they are heading back to the highway. He reaches over to turn the wheel, which nearly drives them into a fir. “We should take the others out before we deal with Barrow again. That big clearing over there could give us more maneuverability or make them cocky. Either way, I think we should enjoy the relative silence for a bit longer.”

“Fuel is going to be a problem if we keep this going much longer,” Cassidy says, pointing at the gauge. Coming out of the trees, she veers south and heads for a dirt road that will bring them back to the main road. “You have until I get there to do whatever it is you’re planning. Are you finally going to use a real gun?”

“And lose one of my quirks? Never!”

Crawling into the back, Lloyd stands in order to look through the clear dome and get an idea of where his targets are. Opening the four holes that allow him to shoot in every direction, he loads his paintball gun with black pellets. He fires at the nearest biker, the projectile splattering tar over the man’s face. Another shot hits the enemy’s open mouth and the sticky muck lodges in his target’s throat. Swapping out his ammo cartridge for one full of orange paintballs, Lloyd strafes three of the other bikers. The bursts of acid damage their tires and hands, but the shots to the face are what finally put the trio down. Seeing that only two motorcyclists are left, the serial killer scratches his head and struggles to think of what to use next. He does not get a chance to decide when Cassidy spins the jeep around and crashes into the pair. Lloyd takes a few pointless shots at the bouncing bodies, which he swears are still twitching.

“I saw an opening and I took it,” the mercenary claims as they reach the dirt road. Heading back to the highway, she keeps an eye out for Barrow and his yellow sports car. “No idea where the kid went. He would have passed this spot already if he kept going, so I’m going to guess that he’s waiting to ambush us. Keep your eyes peeled for yellow. I’d prefer to go around him than get into an accident.”

“Good thing he isn’t using a more subtle vehicle,” Lloyd mentions as they reach the highway. A honking horn in the distance brings their attention to Barrow, who is far in the distance ahead. “That idiot wants to play chicken? I can’t even begin to see the logic in that unless he thinks we’re cowards.”

“My guess is that he thinks we’ll avoid killing a kid,” Cassidy says while she takes off her denim jacket. Revving the engine in response to the horn, she takes out her binoculars to scan the sides of the road. “There are mounds of dirt along the route and I see people hiding among the trees. He expects us to get out of his way, which will force us to hit whatever those traps are. If they’re mines then we’ll probably be killed immediately. If they’re tire shredders then we’ll be killed slowly. Take the wheel, Lloyd, because I need to use the machineguns.”

“Come on, bitches!” Barrow yells over his intercom. His sports car rushes forward, leaving a trail of smoke in its wake. “I’m going to beat the shit out of you. Smash your fucking brains under my wheels and rape the rest of you. Nobody fucks with the Bulbosa family and lives. I’m going to murder you assholes. Then, I’m going to hunt down everyone you ever met and fuck them up too.”

“Kid simply doesn’t know when to shut up,” the mercenary sighs while she takes aim with two of the machineguns.

Firing at the dirt-covered traps, Cassidy sets off the hidden explosives and takes out a few of the lurking enemies. She continues shooting at the mounds while Lloyd barrels toward Barrow, who has stopped shouting over the intercom. Bringing one of her lines of bullets closer to the sports car, Cassidy gradually forces it towards the other side of the road. Too late, the teenager realizes that he has moved off course and the jeep now has room to pass him. Unable to safely get through the machinegun fire, he is trapped within range of one of the mines. The explosion is enough to flip his vehicle and it rolls toward the other side while Cassidy’s bullets riddle the undercarriage. Hitting another mound, the blast sends the sports car into the air and the fiery wreckage lands behind the departing jeep.

“To be honest, I feel sorry for the kid,” Cassidy admits as she reclaims the driver’s seat.

“I’m going to jam fireworks in your ass and send you into orbit,” Barrow shrieks over the crackling intercom.

“How do you feel now?” Lloyd asks with a chuckle.

“Screw that kid.”

About Charles Yallowitz

Charles E. Yallowitz was born, raised, and educated in New York. Then he spent a few years in Florida, realized his fear of alligators, and moved back to the Empire State. When he isn't working hard on his epic fantasy stories, Charles can be found cooking or going on whatever adventure his son has planned for the day. 'Legends of Windemere' is his first series, but it certainly won't be his last.
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6 Responses to Derailing Bedlam: Land of Stewed ‘Shrooms Part 4 #fiction #adventure

  1. That Barrow kid is something else. A very exciting episode, Charles.


  2. L. Marie says:

    Wow. Talk about indestructible. . . .


  3. Pingback: Derailing Bedlam: Stand Clear of the Closing Doors, Dammit! Part 1 #fiction #adventure | Legends of Windemere

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