The Failure in the Dell. Hi-Ho, The Fucking-O. The Failure in the Dell.

Let’s get a few things out of the way:

  1. Got some writing done on War of Nytefall.
  2. Progress made on son’s Green Lantern outfit, so maybe a post about that soon.
  3. Bladerunner 2049 was a great movie.
  4. My only goal next week is to get more writing done and retain my sanity.  Why?  Let’s get to the main event.

Yahoo Image Search (Is that Danny McBride?)

I’m writing this while seething because yesterday morning was all about contacting Dell to figure out what the fuck is going on.  Oh yeah, there will be cursing in this.  Anyway, a recap for those new to the tragic comedy that is one step away from becoming a road trip horror.

My new laptop was a birthday present back in March and it was great.  Then, the sound began spurting and buzzing in late June.  I sent it in and was minus a computer for about 2 weeks while they put new speakers in.  Got it back in July and then the problem came back a little over a week later.  Sent the laptop back to Dell and got it back within a week, which would be mid-August or something.  Not much of a problem since my son had finished his summer school and I didn’t have any projects.  Then . . . early September . . . the problem came back!  I called and told them that I couldn’t send it in again until January.  They understood, but my warranty didn’t cover a tech coming out to me.  Fine, I’ll do what I can since I could push around the Dell label to get whatever the problem was into place.

Except the problem got worse and then the mouse got into the action.  My sister, one of the purchasers, finally had it and asked permission to call.  Gave it to her and this led to me sending the laptop out last Monday.  I did this because they promised to send me an overnight label/box (they did) and get it back to me by that Friday (they didn’t).  Keep in mind that I’m trying to write the first book of War of Nytefallwanted to make another request for Legends of Windemere finale posts, and had just released Path of the Traitors.  Terrible time to do this, but I was going nuts and they promised that it would take less than a week.  Now, let’s jump to present day:

Yahoo Image Search

I did promise cursing.  You see, I called Dell (identity protection only for the innocent) on Friday morning to figure out what was going on.  The updater hadn’t been updated since last week and this was a week beyond the promised return date.  Where to even begin with this headache that resulted in my portly ass biking 15 miles to at least get the edge off my rage?  Didn’t help, but here we go.

First, I got usual customer service that drove me nuts because they wanted a number off my laptop.  Hard to get that when I don’t have the fucking thing.  Got through that and explained that I just wanted to know what was going on.  Either that or I asked ‘where is my laptop?’ because things were getting rage-fueled already.  I was transferred to the tech service or whatever where they searched for information on my machine.  Two holds later, I could barely confirm that they even had it since even they seemed confused that there were no updates for over 5 days.  I was made a priority (a promise that had already been made) and given the number for the repair people.  Asking if it would just be better for me to let them keep the glorified door stop and get a refund resulted in the usual ‘we understand your frustration’.  No, you don’t!  I work from home and need that laptop because the desktop is for everyone.  After a summer of this crap, I feel like I’m so far behind the 8-ball that I can’t even complete the analogy.  So, I called the repair people and left a message that explained my desire for any information.  Then came the biking, shower, and radio silence.

Eventually, my sister got brought into this because she’s tired of seeing me suffer and they pretty much lied to her.  Here is where things go from infuriating to full on WHAT THE FLYING FUCKING FUCK IS GOING ON?  Apparently, they had learned enough about my situation to tell my sister that things went downhill due to a problem with the monitor.  The fucking monitor!?  I sent it in because of the speakers and mouse!  The monitor was fine when I had it here.  Is the thing rotting from the inside?  Did they need an eleventh person for the company soccer team and put my machine in as goalie?  Does the thing look like a hacky-sack?  Holy fucking shit, I just snapped on that one, but it seems my sister did too.

The result of all this is that we’ll get a refund . . . eventually.  Apparently, Dell suffers from the ridiculously stupids.  They have to send the machine back to me then my sister uses the code she has to activate the refund.  I wait for a box to come and then send it back to Dell where it will either be refurbished for someone else or put on the company’s Board of Directors.  Then, I wait about 2 weeks for the refund, which would put me at getting it in the middle of November.

Pop quiz!  What’s going to happen in December that I need to work on?  Legends of Windemere: Warlord of the Forgotten Age is supposed to debut.  That means I might have to do an editing run in the final hour.  My wife and mom are helping by doing an edit run each to help me out, but I want to do a final look.  The blurbs are ready and tested, which is good and Jason is excited to do the cover.  Means the only one in the dark is me.  I’m not happy.  This is a nightmare and really makes me wonder why I can’t ease into big events or at least have time to revel in them.

By the way, to anyone who wanted to do an interview with me for the new book and hasn’t sent me the info, can we start working on it soon?  I know of 2 character interviews and one author one that I haven’t done yet.  I’m determined to get everything ready to go and minimize the chaos.  If I can claim the desktop for a long time then it will help, but one never knows.  For anyone who hasn’t requested a personalized post to help promote the last book, feel free to ask and we’ll come up with a topic.  I have 25 people so far and always want more.  Thanks.  (Odd way to end such a rant.)

About Charles Yallowitz

Charles E. Yallowitz was born, raised, and educated in New York. Then he spent a few years in Florida, realized his fear of alligators, and moved back to the Empire State. When he isn't working hard on his epic fantasy stories, Charles can be found cooking or going on whatever adventure his son has planned for the day. 'Legends of Windemere' is his first series, but it certainly won't be his last.
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29 Responses to The Failure in the Dell. Hi-Ho, The Fucking-O. The Failure in the Dell.

  1. What the…? The monitor? I’d have snapped at that point too. Even on something compact like a laptop, unless the whole system is messed up, the monitor not working shouldn’t give you issues with the speakers and mouse. My last laptop had a monitor so messed up my hubby couldn’t see anything it was trying to show after I stepped on my laptop one too many times, yet I was able to use it like that no problem since it’s the speakers I rely on. Quite frankly, it sounds like the whole system is messed up, and I’m glad you’re getting a refund (though sorry you have to go through so much to get it).

    We can work on the Fizzle interview whenever you want. I’m not around during the first weekend in November (going away from the Friday to the Monday). But any other time it would just be potential sleep/time difference delays to work with. If there’s anything you need to know before we can get started, shoot me an eMail and I’ll sort out whatever information you want/need.

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    • Pretty much did snap and went for the refund instead of giving them another chance. At that point, it meant everything in the machine was falling apart. Can only imagine the cause, but I’m more annoyed that they didn’t bother to update me on the change. If they dropped it or something happened during transit then I’d like to know since it didn’t happen here.

      Whenever you want to send the initial set up for the Fizzle interview then send it along. I’m not really sure where we want to have it happen beyond a forest.

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  2. There is nothing in the world as infuriating as tech trouble. I’m having problems with my new smartphone – for some reason it only allows emergency calls and I can’t seem to get any sense out of my service provider. I have a tension headache from sitting in phone queues listening to mixtapes of bland vanilla music. 😦

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  3. Frustrated doesn’t begin to cover it, sorry your going through this, Charles. Maybe you can transfer some of the anxiety into the story when and if you ever get your computer up and running. I highly recommend Macbook if your shopping for a new laptop 🙂

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  4. Jennie says:

    OMG! I would have totally snapped. Did you consider calling a local TV channel that has witch hunters who go after and report Dell-like problems? Somehow when your crap goes public, you get results. Just sayin’

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  5. Wow… Dell really has lost everything they had going for them. I can’t believe that they are so backwards. I’m glad you’re getting a refund, I don’t think you would ever have gotten it working correctly.

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  6. I think I’m on the list but want to confirm. This whole story is sad. You did tell it well though.

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  7. Pingback: The Failure in the Dell. Hi-Ho, The Fucking-O. The Failure in the Dell. – The Militant Negro™

  8. victoriaisle says:

    I have always believed after 2007, they started making computer to only last for 6 months – a year.

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  9. I know I’m on the list somewhere. You can make me dead last in order to preserve your sanity. I’m always happy to help, but a guy needs a breather every once in a while. Time for Lloyd and Cassidy to visit the Dell repair center.

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    • Aside from the interviews, all other guest posts have been written. Did it before the second round with Dell to be safe. I’m taking a small breather once I finish writing the new book, but I don’t think I’ll take a real one until this mess is over. Lloyd and Cassidy definitely need to make an appearance. They’ll have 2018 off, so they can take their time.

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  10. Ugh, so sorry you have to deal with all this.

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  11. L. Marie says:

    Oh man! I’m so sorry, Charles. What an infuriating situation. And so ridiculous too. 😤 😠 😡 I’m so sick of these crappy computers! And the service has been bad!

    I’m also on the list. I’m sorry I haven’t gotten back to you. I’ve been really busy the last two weeks. I hope to get my act together this week.

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    • The service was the worst part. If the computer was crap and they replaced it then it wouldn’t be as bad. It’s just been a fight to get this far.

      No problem. I’ll be slow in responding to interviews until the laptop issue is solved. Even then I might be a little gun shy and do the big stuff on the desktop when I can.

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