7 Tips to Earning Redemption: Success Not 100% Guaranteed

Posted on September 6, 2017 by Charles Yallowitz

C.S. Lewis Quote (Maybe. This is the Internet after all.)

So, you’ve done a lot of bad things, but now you have a chance at getting redemption. It’s something that a lot of villains don’t get. To make sure you don’t ruin this once in a lifetime opportunity, here is some advice:

  1. Avoid laughing maniacally and doing your grand villain speeches. They made sense when you were trying to instill fear in your enemies. Now, it’s kind of creepy and makes people think you’re faking this whole hero thing. Wait at least a year into your new life before doing this in a mocking way. If that’s too long then try to cover both with a coughing fit.
  2. You can only apologize and request a ‘do over’ so many times before people think you’re not taking this hero thing seriously. While it may be easier to work off instinct and clean things up later, it doesn’t win you any points. Doesn’t matter how many fruit baskets and balloon bouquets you send out. People still remember when you did bad things with a smile.
  3. Don’t smile so often when you’re doing anything aggressive or violent. You know for a fact that henchmen and goons are hired with the expectation that they’ll only be around for a few paychecks.  That doesn’t mean the hero version of you should look like you’re having fun beating them up.  Try to look serious or at least wear a mask to hide the glee.
  4. For the love of god, torture isn’t a heroic action. Intimidation is one thing, but leave the fingernails in place. Don’t even think of taking those pliers to the tongue too. Just walk away from the toolbox, buddy.
  5. None of this will come naturally after being a villain for so long.  It might be awkward to ask for tips to being a hero, so there is an alternative.  Read articles and watch interviews with those who defeated you.  Try to figure out what it is that makes them beloved and respected.  You won’t get it right the first, second, third, or . . . Let’s just say practice makes perfect.
  6. Change your wardrobe to be friendlier.  That spiky armor works to intimidate the local populace, but you don’t want kids who love you to run up for a hug.  Besides the awkwardness, you’ll go broke paying medical fees.  This could also be problem if your villain clothing was rather revealing or skintight.  Not as much as you would think, but you will be criticized for being tacky.
  7. Charity work is always a good thing. Spend time with kids, animals, the elderly, or any of the numerous groups that need help. Put a smile on their face and maybe you’ll end up smiling back.

About Charles Yallowitz

Charles E. Yallowitz was born, raised, and educated in New York. Then he spent a few years in Florida, realized his fear of alligators, and moved back to the Empire State. When he isn't working hard on his epic fantasy stories, Charles can be found cooking or going on whatever adventure his son has planned for the day. 'Legends of Windemere' is his first series, but it certainly won't be his last.
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19 Responses to 7 Tips to Earning Redemption: Success Not 100% Guaranteed

  1. John W. Howell says:
    September 6, 2017 at 10:53 am

    Might be good to hire a hero as an image consultant as well. Good job, Charles.

    Liked by 2 people

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  2. coldhandboyack says:
    September 6, 2017 at 11:56 am

    Somehow, I can see Lloyd asking for a do over.

    Liked by 1 person

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  3. L. Marie says:
    September 6, 2017 at 12:17 pm

    Great tips! Yeah the maniacal laughter should be downplayed. 🙂 Perhaps theft also should be placed on the back burner. I can hardly believe someone wants to change if they keep stealing my wallet.

    Liked by 1 person

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  5. debyfredericks says:
    September 7, 2017 at 9:33 pm

    If you’re really a sneaky mastermind, you can engineer the destruction of your former bases and equipment — without loss of life of course — so your evil self is believed to be dead. Wait a few months, then introduce a new identity with a different look. Easy peasey.

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