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Dragon: I call this meeting of the Brotherhood of Monsters to order.
Elf: Can we have a different name? Some of us aren’t monsters any more.
Orc: Yeah!
Dragon: Put in a petition later. What do we have to discuss?
Griffin: Many of us are still being used and altered to the whims of humans. Am I supposed to be a monster, a mount, or a pet?
Hippogriff: At least you get remembered while I get confused for you. One fandom seems to remember me, but that’s it. It sucks being your cousin.
Orc: Yeah!
Manticore: Nobody thinks of me. Do any of you know the last time I was used?
Centaur: Probably a God of War game like many of us. The harpies are still in traction from that series.
Dragon: This bickering and whining does nothing. You should be happy with what you get or do you want to vanish like some of our brethren.
Dwarf: Of course, you’re happy. Nobody forgets dragons. Even in worlds with minimal magic, they seem to have dragons.
Orc: Yeah!
Dragon: I can think of a few worlds without dragons. It isn’t my fault that my kind are so popular.
Elf: The dwarf has a point though. You exist everywhere, which is why you rule the council. You are wise, but you do not understand our plight.
Orc: Yeah!
Minotaur: Shut up, pointy ears! You don’t understand either. Ever since you were made beautiful and elegant, you get into everything. Nobody fantasizes about my kind unless you count nightmares.
Orc: Yeah!
Siren: Am I beautiful or ugly? I don’t know any more. Can somebody tell me?
Mermaid: I think it depends on the author and if they think you’re me. Damn red-haired tart and her voice ruined it for the rest of us.
Lamia: Nobody knows how I am!
Vampire: I don’t even know if I’m a monster anymore.
Werewolf: Why can’t I get the girl?
Zombie: I want a vacation!
Orc: Yeah!
Dragon: EVERYONE SHUT UP!!!!! Every meeting ends with this problem. You get what cards you’re dealt and enjoy existing. Hold out and an author might use you for more than a monster to be slain. Where’s the dignity of being a monster?
Gathered Monsters: Sorry.
Dragon: Very well. Do we have anything else to discuss?
Griffin: Nope. We don’t really have anything to talk about as a group. These meetings are for the free food, drinks, and venting.
Demon: I told you we should have brought back the virgin sacrificial dinners.
Angel: Nobody listens to you.
Dragon: Do I have to eat you two again?
Angel & Demon: Sorry, sir.
Dragon: I guess this meeting is over as quickly as the others. Does- *Orc raises hand* I’m going to regret this. What is it?
Orc: Me think we should make t-shirts for extra money. Also, bake sale.
Dragon: I do love brownies. Very well. We’ll each make some plans for a bake sale to discuss at next week’s meeting. Don’t forget to let our absent friends know about this new endeavor. Until next week.
Legends of Windemere 
Hahaha! This is hysterical!
“Zombie: I want a vacation!”
and
“Dragon: Do I have to eat you two again?
Angel & Demon: Sorry, Sir.”
are my favorite parts! 😀
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Personally, I like the Orc. Though, I got to the zombie and figured how would say that. Poor guy never gets a break.
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Reblogged this on Practical Creative and commented:
Other Worlds, Other Voices … right up my street!
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Hahaha! I didn’t think the Orc knew how to say anything other than “Yeah!” LOL
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He can use words when motivated by baked goods.
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Cupcake?
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Orc is more of a bear claw guy.
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Sounds a lot like my brother. Does he like pizza, too?
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Orc will eat anything. So yes. Seriously, you’re the only person I’ve met that doesn’t like pizza. Hold your head up high with your uniqueness.
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LOL! I’m the only person I know who doesn’t like pizza, too. 😉
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You just want to be cool. 😛
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If not liking pizza makes me cool, thean yes, of course! That was my plan all along! 😉
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I knew it!
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Guess you are smarter than I am, Little Brother.
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Hilariously great writing! Love that pic for this.
Patti
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Thanks. Took a while to find that pic. Very few pictures of multiple monsters.
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It is so perfect. I’m one of the comm groupies and world have opened it anyway, but that pic drew me in.
Just FYI.
Patti
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Good to know. I wish I could make pictures like this so I didn’t have to hunt them down.
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Isn’t there a computer or other artist in the group? Maybe do a call out?
Patti
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There’s Jason who does my cover art, but getting someone to make a picture for every post I make isn’t an option. I post at least 3 times a day. I’d go bankrupt and run through artists like tissue paper.
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too true…I just get out and take pics, but I’m not in your league or writing what you are…
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Not really about league. I live in the suburbs. Not very fantasy picture friendly. Also, I lack a decent camera.
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damn no unicorns on your block? I’ll watch for creatures in my area that would work:>)
League, meaning genre more or less.
I know there are some mermaids, but sooo camera shy!
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Have the occasional ogre or pegasus. A Roc once, but it was a miniature Roc.
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damn, we need to get you a camera!
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I see the ogre more than the others, so I’m fine without it. Ugly sucker.
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This made me laugh
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Yay! I did my job.
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Very nice. I particularly like the zombie needing a vacation.
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He’s so tired.
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I agree with the orc.
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The monster knows how to earn money.
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Bake sale
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And t-shirts! They go up to dragon size, which doubles as a hot air balloon.
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Pregnancy sized lol
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They should make pregnancy clothes that can be shrunk when you’re done with them.
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Design them
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I’m not science-y enough. I need Fritz and magic.
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You crack me up…yeah!
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Thanks. Yeah! That Orc really grew on me.
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Reblogged this on howanxious and commented:
You wouldn’t want to miss this council… 😀
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Vampire and werewolf.. amazing.. But I loved the Orc above all.
Damn hilarious… 😀
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I think the Orc and Zombie stole the show.
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“Damn red-haired tart” – I love it! Well, that and the Orc’s bake sale. Very funny, Charles!
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Thanks. I hope he gets his bake sale.
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I do, too. I miss bake sales (granted, being celiac, I can’t participate unless I contribute and then buy my own stuff, but they’re still fun – and there’s always rice-krispie treats!)
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Do you have to actually buy your own stuff? Sounds like a terrible cycle.
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It’s vicious.
My home-made gluten (now grain) free stuff isn’t bad, but most people still equate gluten-free with cardboard (and they’re not wrong). But then, I was a huge baker before diagnosis, so I insist it taste good.
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My sister bakes a lot, so she’s found some gluten free recipes. Most of them aren’t that bad.
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I find the things people make themselves are the best. The store-bought stuff is improving, but half the time I think it’s because I can’t remember what it “really” is supposed to taste like.
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Store bakeries are great when you’re a kid. The ones around here give free cookies to toddlers.
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So do mine. I swear, that was the only reason Tom would go to the store with me when he was little. He could usually manage to worm two or three out of the bakery ladies when I was trying to decide on cheese in the deli. Cheeky kid.
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It really was the only reason. Those carts weren’t comfy.
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lol! 🙂
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break out the brownies…
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I’m sure they’re normal brownies too. 🙂
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some Orcs are shamen aren’t they… they might have some interesting ingredients…
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Definitely. I’d be more worried about what the zombie puts in his bunt cake.
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Yeah! I think the Orc may be the smartest member of the group, baked goods sound great. This was a lot of fun, I hope you write more of this in the future. 🙂
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Thanks. It just came to me, so we’ll see if I can repeat it.
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What a fun read 🙂
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Thanks. Glad you enjoyed it.
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“Yeah!” I love the Orc…this piece Charles is absolutely GENIUS! I love it!
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Thanks. The Orc is my favorite too. Followed by the zombie.
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Yeah! ;P
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